I raced through traffic, feeling my stomach clench. I grit my teeth and swore under my breath, drumming my fingers impatiently against the steering wheel. Come on you bastards, hurry up, hurry up, move!
I had to go to the bathroom. Bad. We've all been in that situation where our internal alarm begins to blare and it's a race against the clock to get to the toilet. It's where you say a silent prayer and cross your fingers, making a wish to your lucky star that you'll make it in time.
Well right then, it felt like I was going to explode in the car.
My stomach cramped again and I looped my finger into the waistband of my pants, pulling it up to relieve some of the pressure. I heard my belly rumble and I swallowed hard. Christ, I was going to shit my pants if I didn't hurry.
The light I was stuck at turned green and I floored it, my house only a few blocks away. I groaned out loud and leaned forward as my gut howled and doubled into itself. I started breathing like I was going to give birth, begging God, devoting myself to whatever he asked of me just so long I didn't crap my pants.
I roared the car into the driveway and kicked the door open as I shut the engine off. I sprinted to the front door, hunched over in desperate agony, and burst into the house.
I threw my keys onto the floor and slammed the door behind me as I crashed into the bathroom. I pulled my pants down and sank onto the toilet with a satisfying moan.
I felt my bowels erupt in a frantic release and I sighed with euphoric relief.
As I sat there, eyes closed, I heard something splash loudly under me.
I snapped my eyes open as something brushed against my bare ass.
As I leaned forward to look at what was going on, I suddenly screamed as my anus ignited with pain.
I fell forward and collapsed to my knees in front of the toilet, howling as a sharp wriggling pain wormed up inside of me. I also felt little sharp stabs on my bare ass and I cocked my head back to see what the hell was happening.
Sticking out of my ass was the bottom half of a rat.
It had its head inside of me and was thrashing around, gnawing and cutting up the inside of my asshole.
My eyes widened and I screamed in horrified terror. The back legs of the rat squirmed some more and tried to push itself deeper inside of me, its little feet cutting into me.
What the fuck! WHAT THE FUCK! My mind howled in chaotic pain. The rat must half traveled up through the pipes and been stuck in my toilet, just waiting for some means of escape.
More pain spiked up my body and I felt the bastard digging deeper inside of me. Blood and shit leaked from my asshole onto the white tile floor. Sweat popped out on my forehead and I heard noises escaping my lips I didn't know I could make.
I reached around and grabbed the exposed part of the rat. It squirmed in my grip and its tail lashed around in desperate attempts to free itself.
Screaming, I began to pull it out of me, my bloodshot eyes wide and brimming with terrified tears. I felt warmth running down my thighs and the smell of shit and piss shoved itself up my nose. I gagged and felt the rat bite down inside of me.
I howled and released my grip, collapsing on my stomach. I could feel its head squirming around inside my lower intestines and I vomited on the floor, vision blurring as the stench of stomach bile joined with the rest of the putrid aromas.
Panting, feeling its back legs kick against my ass cheeks, I dragged myself across the floor. I was breathing in labored sobbing gulps, my body coated in my own reeking sludge. Sweat dripped from my nose and another jolt of pain coursed through my lower half as the rat bit into something else.
I pulled myself into the kitchen and yanked open a drawer, pulling it down to the floor and spilling its contents in front of me.
I snatched up a long corkscrew and gripped it in my sweaty hands.
I leaned back and slammed the point into the exposed part of the rat.
I heard it scream from inside of me.
It thrashed as blood squirt from the wound, its tail and legs wildly kicking about. It tried to bury itself deeper inside of me, by I grabbed its tail and pulled.
I felt it give a little, with a wet sucking sound, and from my stomach I reached back and slammed the corkscrew down again.
I was rewarded with a warm splash of blood and another scream. It was almost dead.
Panting, tears rolling down my face, I reached behind me one last time and grabbed the squirming rat with one hand and squeezed. I felt blood and bone explode around my fingers as I slowly crushed the life out of the fucker.
The rat stopped moving as my fingers met, surrounded in a casing of gore and fur.
Sucking in lungfuls of putrid air, I slowly pulling the dead mangled corpse from my asshole. I screamed as it exited me, a torrent of blood and shit following its snout as it cleared my anus.
I threw the bastard against the wall and watched it SPLAT and slowly slide down to the floor leaving a bloody trail behind it.
Hands shaking, I reached for my phone and dialed 911.
As the line rang, a thought crossed my mind and I almost laughed.
How the fuck am I going to explain this?
