wanted (phan) || book #3

eighteen

D A N ' S  P O V

"You can all turn around now," I spoke.

Phil pulled me out of the river and used an old blanket that we managed to save to cover me. I climbed out of the water and wrapped myself in the fabric.

He then walked to the parked car on the street, which luckily we had stacked emergency items in the trunk- including clothes.

Alex passed me an old, ripped up white tee and sweatpants with my old sneakers that Phil had bought me around the first time we started dating. I grinned, to myself, missing how happy the two of us used to be.

"You look great, hobbit. Love the curls," Oliver teased.

I groaned, remembering that my natural curls loved to make an appearance while damp.

"Shut up before I curl your face with my fist," I playfully snarled, the two of us heading over to the group. I coughed in my arm, the urge to my blow my nose strong.

"I don't think you can curl-" Layla began, but I cut her off.

"Wanna bet?"

She stuck her tongue out at me and we trudged over to the car, Phil sitting in the driver's seat completely silent. I sat in the passenger seat, my gaze flicking over to his statue-like figure.

The others noticed how tense my boyfriend was and quit the giggles once we sat down in the car. Then I realized why.

"Small boy named Matthew Cage arrested tonight after shootout at a local gas station. He is said to be alone, although a witness claims there was another man with him. In others new, runaway identified by the name of Phil Lester is suspected of murder of three victims and destruction of property. However he was not alone. Oliver Skyes, Layla Clark, and Alex Crono seem to also be associated with this crime. Victim Dan Howell was unconscious during this time period, however the anonymous witness has told us that Mr. Howell is with-"

It stopped when Phil aggressively punched the button, clicking the stereo off. His body was shaking as we began driving, and the awkward silence was killing me.

Finally after a few minutes of driving and staring out the window at the dark nothingness, I turned back to the car radio and reached forward. Phil snatched my hand before I could, keeping his gaze locked on the road.

"Don't."

I glared and yanked my hand from his grasp, mumbling under my breath. "I'm just gonna turn on music, I didn't say it was gonna be the new-"

"All you're gonna get is happy pop songs. And right now, I'd really rather not listen to such a positive sound when the only stuff going through my mind is negative. So make your own music, hum, I don't care. Just don't touch the goddamn radio."

I looked in the rearview mirror to see my friends wide-eyed and mouths in straight lines. I furrowed my eyebrows, grabbing onto the door handle.

"Stop the car."

"What? Dan, we're literally in the middle of nowhere- all you're gonna get is grass and trees. I am not going-"

"Stop the damn car or I will."

He slammed on the breaks and I pushed open the door, stomping out of the car and hurrying into the forest.

"Hey, slow down!" Layla called out. I could hear Phil's engine still on, indicating his car was following me.

"Jesus Christ, use this speed for outrunning the cops, not us!" Alex yelled afterwards.

"Did you get As on the pacers or something?"

I found a clear spot in the forest where trees had separated, pausing and laying down.

I stared up at the sky.

"Guys he's having a moment," Oliver chuckled. "Let him be. Phil, you go apologize for being an ass."

"Hey!"

I held in a giggle and exhaled, running a hand through my curls. I covered another cough with my sleeve and heard rustling in the bushes, not even bothering to look over.

At this point of time, it's when you're so sad that you don't even really care what happens to you.

"If you're gonna kill me, make it quick."

The footsteps paused and Phil's voice rang out. "Wasn't planning on it."

I turned my head and my vision had Phil sideways, walking over and laying down next to me.

I furrowed my eyebrows. "Where are the others?"

"Resting in the car. That's where we'll be living for awhile," my boyfriend replied. I nodded, not reaching for his hand like I usually do. "I'm sorry."

"Please don't say that. I've heard so many loved ones say that and they never got the chance to say it again, so I don't want you jinxing it."

"Well if you want me to knock on wood, we're surrounded by trees so I think we're covered," he joked. I let out a small giggle. "You know I used to fantasize scenarios about us in my head. Before all this happened I used to wonder what'd it be like to have a family with you. A house and kids. . . . It used to make me smile. I used to think it could happen."

"And why can't it?"

"We've done too much. We've hurt too many people. Hiding it from our kids would destroy us, and if they found out about our past they'd run just like we did our whole lives," he explained. "Dan, as much as you don't want me to say it, I have to," he responded, changing the subject. "We're wanted now because of me. They caught it on camera. We're on the news. And God, my parents. They're probably hearing about it too. And our old acquaintances from support group, they'll remember our names. Dan, I think our story has finally reached an end."

I turned on my side and looked at him, noticing a tear sliding down the side of his cheek. He turned to me and we locked eyes. I sniffed. "Every love story has an end to it anyway, right?" I murmured, my voice wavering. "Ours just doesn't have a happy one."

"Do we really deserve one, though?" He whispered. I shut my mouth, shaking my head, then the tears came. "I mean what happens after this? To them?" He gestured to the car, and hearing their laughs from a conversation they were having broke my heart a little bit more. "I failed them. I failed my family. I failed you."

I took his hand in mine, staring up at the stars again. "You know, one of the things on my bucket list was to stargaze with my lover." I ignored his last comment.

"I'm glad I got to be there for it then."

I took a shaky breath, more tears streaming down my face.

"Phil."

"Yeah?"

"We're not gonna make it, are we?"

He looked away from me and up at the sky, squeezing my hand.

"No, baby. I don't think we will this time."

I turned to face him, then whispered.

"What would you do if I died tonight?"

We made eye contact, and he reached out to stroke my cheek before answering. The last tear left his eye, and our last goodbyes left our mouths.

"I'd die tomorrow."