14 | vemödalen

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14 | vemödalen
the fear that everything has already been done

dedicated to bitchmafia , kolsmikaelson , lucksless and DankFabio - thank you for being just amazing 💙

dedicated to bitchmafia , kolsmikaelson , lucksless  and DankFabio  - thank you for being just amazing 💙

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FOR THE FIRST time in a week, I was finally able to shut my eyes without fear of the nightmares that may pursue

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FOR THE FIRST time in a week, I was finally able to shut my eyes without fear of the nightmares that may pursue. No flashbacks, visions, or horrible fragments of my memory came to haunt me as darkness wrapped a heavy veil around my sleeping body. Cheek pressed up against the passenger window, and legs curled beneath me with unease, I had never felt so comfortable since discovering my past had been removed.

Perhaps it was because I finally knew what I had done, even though I couldn't live with it. Or perhaps it was because Damon was sat beside me, the Toyota hurtling back in the direction of his hotel room.

Alexander's brown heart was still ingrained in my mind. And so was the memory of me cutting it out of his chest. The thought made me want to throw up, and cause my intestines to fasten in a ball too tight to unknot. Yet the question still lingered - who had compelled me to go against all my morals?

And as far as I knew, the answer lay with my phone.

My cracked, iPhone SE, which was lost.

I didn't awake from my slumber until I felt Damon's strong arms wrap themselves under my legs and carry me out of the car. My head fell against his chest, heart beating steadily and soothing me as he carried me from busy London street, into the Hotel lift, and onto his hotel double bed.

After a moment cuddled into the soft sheets, I finally scraped open my eyes. The initial wave of tiredness had washed over me, leaving a burning feeling of guilt and nausea in its wake. Damon had had the ingenuity to turn the lights off, leaving the multicoloured horizon to light up the room. Red traffic lights glared in the distance, and the bright white outlined Damon's silhouette figure against the window like a perfect picture. He had stripped his suit jacket off his body, leaving him in a long-sleeved shirt and blood-stained trousers. Cufflinks undone and hair ruffled, I wanted nothing more than to see his face.

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