07 | clarkson

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CHAPTER SEVEN

CLARKSON

( — kelly clarkson; american singer and songwriter, who rose to fame after winning the inaugural season of american idol. )

          SELINA QUICKLY FINDS HERSELF IN THE MOST EMBARRASSING SITUATION EVER

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          SELINA QUICKLY FINDS HERSELF IN THE MOST EMBARRASSING SITUATION EVER. After Ethan exits the bathroom and leaves her alone in the room, with the door closed, she does what anyone in her shoes would do after the conversation they just exchanged.

          She approaches the sink, firmly holds the sides with both hands, stares into her reflection's eyes, and declares, "You are pathetic." 

          Then, she bursts into tears, suddenly aware of the physical similarities between her and Jersey—the eyes and the hair, mostly, which they both get from their father. Jersey is several inches shorter than her, barely hitting five feet two, but doesn't try to compensate by wearing five-inch heels.

          Selina knows she would if the roles were reversed. Back in the day, it was everyone's bread and butter to compare the two of them, arguing Selina was more 'legit' just because Jersey is mixed (which is a complete nonsense), but, most of the time, they compared their accomplishments and closeness to the family. After all, Andrew Yang used to be a movie star back when he was younger, the son of Chinese immigrants who made a name for himself and climbed his way to the top before retiring; even though he now lives a much quieter life, he's still pretty popular—popular enough to have his personal life examined under magnifying lenses.

          Jersey graduated magna cum laude from Columbia University last year, and decided to take a break before pouring all her time and effort into a master's degree in Astronomy. Right now, she's living in New York, working as an intern for some magazine, which is definitely not where Selina would have pictured her, but it pays her bills and lets her meet influential people—some of whom she has admired for years.

          Of course she misses her. Even if they didn't spend that much time together when they were younger, they got along just fine, as sisters do. Then, once Selina left to attend college on the other side of the country, the thin thread connecting them finally snapped and all they had left was the occasional small talk whenever they were forced to be in the same room for family reunions.

          So now, years later, Jersey is living her best life in New York and Selina is crying in a bathroom in Los Angeles, even though she a) would much rather be crying in San Francisco because it sounds cooler, and b) brought it all upon herself.

          Someone knocks on the door, and Selina's right hand slips.

          "Sel?" Maia calls. "Did you slip and bang your head and die?"

          "Yeah," Selina confirms, sniffling. She might as well have. "I'll be out in a minute. Do you need to use the bathroom?"

          "No, I'm okay." A brief pause. "Can I come in? Ethan said you could probably use some girl talk." Selina hesitates, staring at the door as if both she and Maia could see through the wooden material. Even though she could use someone to talk to, she supposes only Jersey would do, and she doesn't even know where to begin when it comes to her sister. "Do you need me? I can give you some time alone, if you'd like."

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