fifty five

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6 months after the wedding

Alexa

I stood up tall, taking a deep breath in, holding for a few seconds, and then exhaling. The cool breeze blew gently, running through my hair and making me tingle

My fingers clasped the wooden fence as I smiled at my view, where I am now allows me to see my city from up high, like I am an outsider watching everything go on. This exact spot makes me feel safe, I can see everything and everyone, it calms me down. It reminds me that I am living my life alongside hundreds of other individuals who are also living their lives, and I am so unaware of it

Surrounding me, my Mum, Mark, and my four brothers, all standing and taking in the view alongisde me. Neither of us knows what the other is thinking or focused on. We all have our different perspectives and view this skyline in a way that the other one doesn't

The sun is setting in the distance, casting warm orange accross the city, whilst the moon is going to be sat in the sky shortly. Down below, the city is silently alive, I cannot hear any noise or voices due to the height we are at, but if I look closely, I can spot different pockets of people doing their own thing. Jumping out at me below is a guy with, who I assume is his girlfriend, I can only just see them hugging on the corner of the road, before he kisses her head and they walk down towards the main city

It's now that I realise who is important to me, and who never mattered. All the friendship issues and ex-boyfriend trauma is in the past, it's made me who I am today and has helped to shape me. My mum leaving to go on her holidays was hard for me to deal with, and something I can't change nor can stop. In my opinion, it made me notice how much my brothers loved me and cared for me. They were there for me when I had no parental figure, when I was upset and lonely. I love them all, even Mark to an extent. He's never going to replace my Father fully, but he's the Father I have always wanted and wished I had

A hand was placed on my right shoulder, followed by a kiss on the top of my head. I turned to see Brandon to my right and Elliott joining behind me to my left. Gently I smiled and took a deep breath, turning my back on the scenic view and engulfing my brothers in a hug, which they returned. I love my brothers, they're like my best friends, it's taken a while to realise this but they're the people who I hold closest to my heart

When you're a kid, you hate your siblings most of the time, you fight and argue constantly, physical or verbal fights..but then there's the times where you're all getting along, you're either laughing, talking, playing a game or just enjoying each others company

When I was younger, if me and my brothers had a fight, it was always four on one, I rarely had anyone on my side, and I thought they hated me. The words they said to me and the words I said back, the times they would punch or slap me and the punches and slaps I returned..it all seems minor now, we just grew up a lot over the past few months. We realised how short life is and that you can't take it for granted, because it can be gone in the blink of an eye...

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