Lost Wolf

crazy world

S t e l l a

*trigger warning: this chapter contains some disturbing scenes, read at your own discretion*

"Childhood should be carefree, playing in the sun; not living a nightmare in the darkness of the soul." -Dave Pelzer

We live in a crazy world.

And I have just about enough of it.

I let my clenched fist unclench and calmed my anger because I knew that nothing good would ever come out of it anyways.

Instead, I picked up my wet shoes that were thrown into the toilet. I hear a few snickers behind me to find the suspects of who may have done this.

Of course it was Jane and our other coworkers, but Jane liked to act as their leader. I took a deep breath and put the shoes inside a plastic bag so it wouldn't drip everywhere.

Seeing their contemptuous and mocking glances, my anger boiled and I wanted to let it take me over. But I knew that it was stupid.

Anything I would do to them would just prove that I truly was the freak that they paint me to be.

"Here it comes." I hear one of them say, pertaining to me.

"Don't look, something might happen to you." another said.

I walked past them, not giving them the time of the day. I refuse to give them satisfaction of hurting me. No, let's rephrase that. I refuse to give them satisfaction of knowing that they successfully hurt me.

Because to be honest, who likes to be singled out, bullied, and ostracized?

No one.

"Here's your tip for the day, Stella." my manager Rob said and handed a twenty dollar bill. I stared at it.

I'm, for a fact, sure that my tips were more than a single twenty bill. This is why pooling tips and dividing them at the end of the day was extremely unfair.

He observes my reaction and lets out a sigh as if he hated the trouble of having to explain the reason my earnings are so low for the hundredth time. 

"Stella, I'm sure you understand. All the other workers and some customers are complaining about you, the least we can do is give them a bigger share of tips for them to keep working." he explained as if the nonsense coming out of his mouth was reasonable.

I wanted to slam the bathroom-water-dripping-shoes that I had on one hand, but I held it off.

"If that's for the better Rob, then you can let everyone rob me." I say sarcastically, putting the bill in my pocket and quickly walking away before I suffocate at the toxicity of the place.

"C'mon, Stella! Try to understand!" I hear him scream from behind, but I didn't turn back. I passed by the kitchen and went out through the back door.

The cold fall breeze greeted me and with my wet shoes in hand, I walked towards the bus stop. I stared into nothingness until the bus came.

The bus driver recognized me and looked at the bag I was carrying today. He tried to smile encouragingly and I only nodded towards him and took a seat. Luckily, there was a single seat right beside the windows.

It didn't take long for me to arrive at my bus stop. Again, the bus driver spared me a pity look.

From the bus stop, it was another 10 minute walk to finally reach the house I lived in. No, it's not home. It's hell.