Cultivator's Group Chat

Chapter 1: Jin Ling's Bakery

Stretching one leg in the air and spinning the other one to follow, Wei Wuxian went down his bed. "Is Lan Zhan really cheating on someone as handsome as I?" He groans in despair. Wei Wuxian walks towards Lan Zhan's secret stash of Emperor's Smile (Wei Wuxian's favorite alcohol beverage). He had slept in Lan Zhan's room the previous night. This was to check up on his boyfriend's whereabouts... but they ended up banging instead😔

"My hips are sore." Wei Wuxian places a hand on his side. He scans the empty room. Once again he had awoken to Lan Zhan nowhere to be found. He chugs a bottle of Emperor's Smile. He scofs. "I bet he's having fun with another man right now."

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"Wen Ning!" Lan Zhan shouts.

"Ah, Hanguang-jun what do I do?" Wen Ning groans. Sweat beads form on his forehead as he pants heavily.

Lan Zhan's lips purse in frustration. "Shut up and get help!"

"Yes sir!" Wen Ning responds stiffly. He hurries outside to call for help.

Lan Zhan's eyes enlarge as the fire grows taller. Wen Qing had warned him beforehand not to let Wen Ning cook unsupervised, let-alone handle fire. He ignored this and ended up almost burning his ceiling off. Thankfully, Jiang Cheng arrives just in time before the flames could make contact with the party decorations. He waddles swiftly towards the burning pot, carrying a wooden bucket filled with water. Jiang Cheng splashes the fire, effectively taking it out. Bucket-in-hand, he faces Lan Zhan.

"Hanguang-jun, didn't Wen Qing already tell you not to let Wen Ning cook alone?!" Jiang Cheng scolds.

"Yes," Lan Zhan replies with very minimal expressions.

"Then why was Wen Ning cooking?" Jiang Cheng retorts.

"Geges!" Wen Ning arrives. He puts a hand on the entrance's door frame, taking heavy breaths.

"And you." Jiang Cheng points in Wen Ning's direction. "Why did you cook in the first place if you've literally burned an entire bakery down before?"

"That was just one time!" Wen Ning rebuttals.

Jiang Cheng rolls his eyes. "Yeah, and it was just my niece's bakery."

"Jin Ling was bound to burn it down someday!" Wen Ning whimpers.

Jiang Cheng scrunches his face. "I know that much, but how did you even manage to start a fire from yeast? F*CKING YEAST."

Wen Ning was at a loss for words. He could not explain it himself either.

"Are you done?" Lan Zhan speaks, breaking the silence. Despite his lack of expression, he is clearly annoyed.

"Yeah," Wen Ning whispers.

Before Jiang Cheng could respond, he darts his eyes down then back up. He raises an eyebrow. He puts the bucket down while maintaining eye contact with Lan Zhan.

"What?" Lan Zhan asks.

Jiang Cheng scans Lan Zhan's neck.

He chuckles sarcastically. "You f*cked my brother again?"

Lan Zhan chokes on his spit. He lets out an airy cough, punching his chest. An unconvincing "no" escapes his mouth.

Jiang Cheng decides to let it go for now. He was in no mood to get angry, especially since it was his brother's birthday. To be frank, he felt pity towards Lan Zhan's transparency... or should he say his pathetic inability to lie. Lan Zhan might as well have said "Yes, I did and I liked it."

Jiang Cheng clicks his tongue. "Just shut up and tell everyone to get ready."

Lan Zhan nods, flustered. "Ok."