Capturing Hue

Episode 08

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"Place your hand over your heart. Can you feel it? That's called purpose. You're alive for a reason so don't ever give up."

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Episode 08

How can you say to a suicidal person to not give up?

"Bakit gan'to ang grades mo, Tanna? Mas mababa kaysa noong nakaraan!"

I looked at my parents with disbelief because of their reaction towards my grades for the first quarter. Mababa? But my average is 97! Isang point na lang ay Highest Honors na 'ko!

"Aim for the best, Tanna. Hindi ba sabi ko sa'yo eh ang i-aim mong makuha ay Highest Honors? Then, what is this?"

My mom looked really disappointed while my Dad was just sipping on his coffee while watching us. "Payag ka ba rito, Hon? Parang hindi na ata siya nag-aaral eh!"

I frowned because of what my Mom just said. Hindi nag-aaral?

What about all those sleepless nights to ace an exam? What about the almost no-eating habits because I need to finish all the requirements? Are those not considered as studying?

"Leave her be, Hon. Mataas na 'yan. Tanniah is doing her best, right?" Sabay tingin sa'kin ni Daddy.

I sighed heavily before slowly nodding as I feel pressured about their ways. I just sighed in defeat.

After our small but stressful talk, I decided to go upstairs to rest. All of these had been tiring me so much. I feel so exhausted after listening to their expectations and pressures on me.

I understand them, alright? I understand that they wanted the best for me, but I'm still their daughter, and they should have let me speak up first about my dream then support it.

People say that we should always obey our parents, and I lived with that belief. I'm striving to obey my parents and live with their expectations each day. Pero minsan parang sila na ang kumokontrol sa buhay mo.

And me? I have no voice to speak up because I know that they're the cause of why I'm still living and breathing until this very day. Hays. . .

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"I climb every mountain. . . And swim every ocean. . ."

I strummed my guitar harmoniously, with my eyes closed, and my voice still vibrating inside my room. I installed soundproof panels so that they won't know I'm playing instruments. Baka bigla pa nila akong pigilan sa mga gusto ko.

I badly wanted to buy a Ukelele but I don't have the chance to go to a mall. Baka masabihan ako nila Mommy na gumagala lang at hindi nag-aaral.

Just as I was about to sing another song again, my phone beeped above my table. I saw how our friend group chat was active.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit nila ako sinama rito eh ayo'ko naman ng social media accounts. I prefer to be the silent person because some people are just feeling woke but isn't really doing anything for the betterment of our society. Hypocrites. I opened my phone and started reading our GC.

Leanna: Hi guys! May ginagawa ba kayo?

Clea: Wala naman! What's up, sunny side up?

Selena: LOL clea. I'm also free. Bakit?