From Actor to Healer: Alan Rickman's New Life as a Spirit Guide, Book 1

Chapter 5 - Fireflies

The second weekend of April 2016, Wayne and I were going to teach Reiki Level I on Saturday followed by Reiki Level II on Sunday. To help me focus Saturday morning, since I still hadn't shaken the unexplainable "ogre" feeling, I decided to glance at the news headlines on my phone while eating breakfast.

Because I didn't often browse the Internet on my phone, the first page that loaded was the collage of Alan Rickman's photos that I had discovered after watching Galaxy Quest. Thinking that would cheer me up, I spent a few minutes scrolling down the page and never bothered to open a news site.

When I closed the Internet and put my phone in my purse, Spirit gave me a quick message: "If you see those pictures of Alan this weekend, it means he's in the room with you, watching the class."

I didn't usually distract myself by opening the Internet while teaching. I might check for missed calls or texts during a break, but so far I'd never had a reason to surf the Internet during class. So I dismissed the message as nonsense.

When I arrived at Spiritus, I hugged Wayne hello and he asked how I was doing. "I feel ungrounded," I answered. "I don't feel like myself. I feel like an 'ogre.' I know that sounds weird, but it reminds me of when my dad died. He tried to communicate with me and his message got stuck in my crown chakra."

Wayne said he remembered the incident.

I added, "I'm hoping this weekend helps me feel better."

We began the Reiki Level I class with a lecture on what Reiki is, followed by a brief history of the practice. Then we taught our four students how to muscle test and use a pendulum.(4) Although not essential, these tools can help Reiki practitioners identify areas in need of attention during a treatment.

Afterward, we planned to conduct the Reiki Level I attunement, which is a short meditation that activates the ability to channel Reiki. First, Wayne and I explained to the class what to expect. While deep relaxation is common during the meditation, spiritual experiences often occur as well. Students have reported physical sensations of energy flowing through the body, healing messages from Spirit, and visits from spirit guides and deceased loved ones.

I chose to become a teacher because of my own Reiki Level I and II attunements in 2008. My initiations were more powerful than anything I'd experienced before. Both meditations took me on a spiritual journey. Warm tingles flowed from my head to my feet as my third eye chakra pulsed with energy. A gentle spinning sensation filled my mind, and my third eye expanded to a higher state of awareness.

Then several animal spirit guides and deceased Japanese Reiki Masters appeared in my mind's eye. They encouraged me to continue my self-healing work and share my spiritual gifts with others. I was so moved by their love and support that I broke down in tears.

These attunements showed me that Reiki was different than previous healing methods I'd learned. Nothing had awakened my third eye or allowed me to see spirits like this. I felt like a new person as warm Reiki energy flowed out of my hands. I then understood that Reiki can be a catalyst for spiritual awakenings. Later, I learned that attunements are received directly by the soul, not the physical body. That's why spiritual experiences so frequently accompany them, and why the initiations can be so transformative.

After Wayne and I finished our explanation, we asked the students to make themselves comfortable and close their eyes. Then Wayne turned on a meditation CD and dimmed the lights. I subsequently walked the students through a relaxation exercise and led them to a beautiful scene in nature where they could connect with an animal guide for assistance along their spiritual journey.

After the attunement was concluded, I guided the students to awaken. Then Wayne and I stepped out of the classroom to allow them time to journal their experiences.

We went across the hall to Wayne's healing room where he would conduct private sessions with clients. We relaxed for a few minutes in the two green armchairs across from his healing table. In one corner sat a tall glass display case that housed sundry crystals and statuary, and in the adjacent corner was a black bookcase stuffed with spiritual books and CDs. I sat in the chair between the glass case and bookcase while Wayne sat in the other chair next to the door.

When I looked at him to share my thoughts about the class, I glimpsed eight black DVD cases standing upright on one of the bookshelves at my eye level. The titles were in large gold print, making them easy to read. I did a double take. The entire Harry Potter series was sitting in front of me! I had wanted to see the films and thought I'd have to buy the DVDs.

What were they doing in Wayne's healing room? Did Alan put them there? Did he want me to watch them?

I wasn't sure, but I wasn't going to say a word to Wayne. He knew nothing about my experiences with Alan. I hadn't told anyone at that point. So I decided to wait until after Sunday's class and casually ask Wayne if I could borrow the DVDs.

Afterward, Wayne and I returned to the classroom and asked the students if they would like to share their meditation experiences. Occasionally a student would say that no animal spirit had come forward, but everyone usually saw something. Bears, horses, and eagles were common. Aquatic creatures such as dolphins and jellyfish had also appeared to our students.

One of the students said she had seen a swarm of fireflies. That was unique. Wayne and I weren't familiar with the meaning of fireflies. So he left the room to get his animal totem book from the healing room. While the rest of us waited, I opened the Internet on my phone so I could search for the meaning of fireflies myself.

I was thrown off guard when the collage of Alan's photos popped up. Then I recalled Spirit's message that morning: "If you see those pictures of Alan this weekend, it means he's in the room with you, watching the class." And I had just seen the Harry Potter DVDs in the healing room. Oh my God! It took all my strength not to gasp in front of the students. I didn't want anyone to know what I was going through. Was this for real? Or was I imagining all this?

I kept my face expressionless, opened a new tab, and searched for firefly animal totem. I tapped a link in the list of results, read the explanation, and told the students that fireflies essentially represent illumination and allowing one's inner light to shine. I believed that this lovely spiritual message was intended for me as well as the student who'd received the vision.

After that first attunement of the weekend, I finally felt like myself again. No trace remained of the strange "ogre" feeling. Content and peaceful, I no longer desired to leave Spiritus or quit teaching Reiki. I had no idea where the malaise had come from, but I was grateful that the Reiki Level I attunement had healed me.

Once the students had left on Sunday, Wayne and I took a few minutes to tidy up the classroom. We shared our thoughts about the weekend before I changed the subject. "Hey, I noticed you've got the Harry Potter movies in the other room."

Wayne said the DVDs belonged to one of our graduates. "She brought them in so I could watch them. I've never seen the series. They've been sitting in there for three weeks. I haven't had time to watch them yet."

"I never saw the series either," I said. "I'd like to watch it. If you're not watching it right now, would you mind if I borrow the DVDs?"

"Sure," Wayne said. "Go ahead. Take all of them. And as you watch one, bring it back."

I was floored. I had struck gold! Now I really did think Alan wanted me to see the series . . . and maybe he had been with Wayne and me that weekend, watching us teach.

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(4) Muscle testing, or applied kinesiology, is a method of obtaining answers to yes-no questions directly from the physical body by testing muscle strength on an arm or finger. Typically, a strong response means yes and a weak response means no. A pendulum can be used to answer yes-no questions in a similar manner. While you can make your own with a variety of materials, store-bought pendulums are usually made with a crystal or metal charm attached to a chain. By holding the top of the chain and letting the charm hang straight down, the pendulum is free to move in response to questions. Most commonly a pendulum spins clockwise for yes and counterclockwise for no. However, diagonal and sideways motions for either answer are also possible.