From Actor to Healer: Alan Rickman's New Life as a Spirit Guide, Book 1

Chapter 14 - Spirit Dreams

One morning in the fall of 2016, I awoke around five o'clock. As I lay still and tried to fall back asleep, I felt the urge to reach out to Alan to see if he would respond.

"Alan, are you there?" I asked telepathically.

Alan's voice in my mind was clear and immediate. "I'm here, Sonya."

I shouldn't have been surprised. Alan had repeatedly demonstrated that I could connect with him anywhere and anytime. He existed beyond the earth plane—beyond what we know as physical space—so there was nowhere for him to go. No matter what, he would always be here.

Throughout the summer, Alan had been teaching and healing me by interacting with my conscious mind. But spirit guides aren't often that direct. Most interaction happens on a subconscious level, so we're not aware of their presence.

"Alan," I asked, "you can observe my subconscious mind, can't you?"

"Yes, I am aware of all aspects of your mind."

"And what about my dreams?"

"Yes. If I look in on them, I can see them."

I'd read many reports about deceased loved ones making appearances in dreams. It struck me as a fairly common, easy way for spirits to contact the living by using subconscious means. "Do you have the ability to appear in my dreams?"

Alan was silent a moment. "Yes, I should be able to do it. I'll work on it. Please be patient with me as I learn."

This would be yet another experiment to test the boundaries between the physical world and the higher dimension. I couldn't wait to see what Alan would come up with.

* * * * *

About a week later, I dreamed that Alan was an actor on a stage in a modest theater. Hovering behind him in spirit form, I was able to observe him carefully and read his mind. He looked like his usual self, a gray-haired man in his late sixties. He was casually attired in dark slacks and an untucked red button-down shirt. A row of scenic lights lit up the stage from above. The plain black matte finish on the floor reflected no glare from the lights. The stage was devoid of props and furniture.

Alan was delivering lines in response to another actor that I couldn't make out across the stage. Alan was listening attentively and watching his timing. He projected a strong charismatic presence, but he wasn't making an egotistical attempt to steal the limelight. Then a wave of stage fright washed over me. Alan knew how to conceal it and exude perfect confidence, but I recognized his anxiety for what it was.

A bright white spotlight swept across the stage and shone on him, partially blinding me. As I gazed out at the audience, I could only make out rows of rounded folding seats and silhouettes of people's heads in the darkness. The spectators emanated nothing but love. Their respect and admiration for Alan were palpable. He was aware of it, too, and did his best to set it aside so that he could focus on his job.

I awoke immediately following the dream. The clock on the nightstand read three in the morning. As I lay awake in bed, I told Alan how amazed and appreciative I was that he could use a dream to show me an aspect of his life. In that one short scene, I saw firsthand what it was like to be an actor, to feel "naked" and nervous in front of an audience who knew you and yet didn't know you. It was a powerful experience I wouldn't forget.

After falling back asleep, I had another dream. This time, I went back in time to my twenties, when I was living with my parents. I was excited because I had just received a VHS tape of Galaxy Quest and couldn't wait to watch it. But every time I turned on the film in the living room, my dad would interrupt me, forcing me to stop the tape. He said that the furniture had to be moved, and I was in the way. I had a vague feeling that the house was about to be remodeled or that some other kind of disruption was taking place. The only time I could watch the tape was late at night, after my parents had gone to sleep and I had the living room to myself.

I woke up right after that dream as well. While the first dream had been awe-inspiring, this one was upsetting.

After my parents had died, I often dreamed they had come back to life and I had resumed my role as their caregiver. I loved my parents, and helping them in their time of need was an honor. I'd made many sacrifices for them, and I would do it again if I had to.

Although I still missed them, my time with them was over. I had done my absolute best to help them, and no words had been left unsaid. So whenever I had one of those distressing dreams now, it felt like a step backward.

This kind of dream about my parents hadn't occurred in months, not since Alan had died. Only days before, I had contemplated those recurring dreams and was thankful they had ceased. Alan must have read my mind and used that as inspiration for this morning's dream. I glanced at the clock. It was a little after five. I'd have to get up for work soon.

Then Alan appeared in my mind's eye wearing the costume and alien headpiece he'd worn in Galaxy Quest.

I asked him to explain the dream. His response was, "Think about it."

After pondering it for a moment, I felt that the time period of the dream was a significant clue. This was around the time that my parents had experienced their first bouts with cancer. First, my father was diagnosed with throat cancer in 2000, and then my mother contracted cervical cancer later that year. To say there was a disruption in my household was an understatement.

The only way I was able to spend time with Alan in the dream was by watching his movie when my parents weren't around. In other words, my life with my parents and his life as an actor had separated us. My parents were now gone, so I finally had time to work with him. His life as an actor was now behind him, so he was free to work with me.

"The disruption in the house is over," Alan said. "You have a new life, as do I. Sometimes turbulence proceeds life-altering changes."

While I appreciated that Alan had been able to give me two meaningful dreams, I was disappointed that we weren't able to talk with each other in them. So I asked him if he could give me more interactive dreams. He said he would work on it.