What if we Drown (25)

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Derek stepped slowly towards her, his eyes never straying from hers as he seemed to assess the situation and whether his approach was welcomed

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Derek stepped slowly towards her, his eyes never straying from hers as he seemed to assess the situation and whether his approach was welcomed.

Ashlyn turned away and began picking at her nails, her face hidden in shame.

Like a magic apparition, she'd thought about him, and suddenly he was there, and everything that she wanted to say was lost in the tension between them. She wasn't sure that she could do this, now that he was here. What if Kass was wrong? What if he was here to call it off, whatever it was?

The fear that he already knew what she wanted to say, that he'd heard Kass' conversation while he lurked in the shadows, turned in her stomach. If she weren't already too ashamed, she would have bent over one of the bins and released that acidic fear. But even that was trapped inside, riding on how this next conversation went.

Her hands had a subtle tremor about them, the color of her nails almost completely chipped away. She could hear Derek shift behind her, his steps slowly bringing him closer than he'd been before, but she didn't dare to peek at just how close he was.

It took Kass' soft as a feather voice breaking through the bubble Ashlyn had placed around her, for her to realize that this feeling wasn't going away. She had to say something. Whatever doubts she harbored, she had to speak them into existence, and as Kass had said, allow Derek to make his own choice without her own pre-judgments being forced upon him.

"Sweetie, you remember all the things you just told me? It's time to say them to him," Kass whispered, squeezing Ashlyn's shoulder. When she started to pull away, Ashlyn clutched her hand, afraid to be alone with him in case things didn't go the way she hoped. Worried that she would run again instead of confronting her truth.

"I'm not going far. I'll be right over there if you need me," Kass pointed to the back step of the building on the other side of the lot. She squeezed Ashlyn's hand, then stood to walk across the lot, stopping at Derek's side for a moment to squeeze his shoulder, her eyes communicating a message Ashlyn couldn't quite see.

The silence and distance between the three of them were deafening, each waiting for another to make the next move. Ashlyn watched Kass from the corner of her eye, a hint of desperation in the set of her lips and the slant of her eyes. Kass tilted her head slightly towards Derek, a silent try passing between her lips.

Ashlyn gulped, knowing that it was now or never. Ever so slightly, she turned and looked to the man who had placed her heart in such a dire state.

Derek stood not a meter away, his hands clasped in front of him, his fingers in knots. His shoulders were slumped, his head bowed ever so slightly, his eyes watching her as she turned.

It was the way that he looked at her, with interest, a tender look of concern, and not quite love, but something very similar, that saw what little strength she still had crumbling before her. The tears she'd thought she'd exhausted, were replenished when they started to fall like a Summer's rain.

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