Chase You -1- Formula 1

96. That's one way to rekindle your friendship

How is it possible to commit to family traditions, if the mood maker died? I had no clue myself. Neither had my mum. Our relationship went a bit downhill since our last conversation and we didn't resolve our issues either. Yet, we planned to celebrate harvest moon, the same way we did last year. Surrounded by the people we loved most. The last full moon was actually two weeks ago, but we simply decided to celebrate at the end of September like we had done last year when Soph was still with us. Or at least, that was the excuse my mum used to make up for awful planning.

I honestly dreaded spending so much time with just my mum. At all cost, I avoided her, which wasn't too hard when you spend most of your time on other continents, but it was quite hard to not celebrate a family tradition without family. So, I came up with the smartest idea in centuries; heading back to the Netherlands to celebrate with everyone.

It wasn't that great of an idea, at second thought, now that I was sitting in a grass field, near to my grandparents' farm where it teemed with little creatures they called my cousins. It were just three showing up, but paired with a bunch of dogs, cats, and even cows- my head was buzzing due to all the distractions. Not that I had much to do, but it still bothered me. Usually, I went here as a retreat from all the hectics of F1, now I'd rather be in the Monaco paddock on Sunday.

"How is life?" My favourite -and only present- grandpa Harold asked, sitting down in the itchy and dried out grass. I closed my little notebook and put it down beside me. I shrugged, not the politest response, but I didn't feel like talking at the moment. I told the children all the stories I knew already, and every moment they craved attention, it quite exhausted me.

"Just a bit tired," I sighed, looking at the grey sky above me, a few rays of sunshine managed to break through the clouds, but they shone upon the roof of the neighbours' house, somewhere in the far distance. "Mum probably told you about the fight huh?"

"Yes, she did," grandpa answered. "I am secretly on your side." Harold started speaking softer. "She hasn't been the best mother lately, the past year she focused on Sophia primarily. We can't blame her for that either, but in that time she might've distanced herself from you."

"It's hard not being her favourite, you know?" I asked. "During the sickness and leading up to Soph's death, of course, it makes sense. Caress the time you still have with your child, I completely get that!However, it still comes across as she prefers Soph, and that's so unfair and I hate that I feel that way. And you're Eve's father, I shouldn't be talking to you about this."

"I already said I'm on your side," he sighed. "You know, a very long time ago, I lost my twin brother." I knew Harold was a twin, but I kept forgetting it. Sometimes this man came up with the most random stories at the weirdest moments. "We weren't as close as you and Sophia, but it still hurt." I nodded and leaned a bit forward, unable to hear my grandpa's deep voice from how I sat. "The years following his death, I've been expected to act like him, behave just like him. I literally lived a double life since my parents didn't want to miss Ron."

"That's so toxic." I scrunched up my face and looked at the sky. "Didn't you start to hate your brother after some time? I mean, they didn't appreciate you."

"Surprisingly, no," he answered, rubbing over his knee. "I got frustrated at points, definitely, but hating him? Never." I didn't hate Sophia, as a confirmation, but then again I seemed to be the only person capable of handling her death without letting it ruin or take over my life. "Your mother has her own way of grieving, she feels like she needs to flip everything upside down. Starting with her surroundings."

"I don't think she gets that whatever she's doing, impacts me too," I sighed. "And that's extremely selfish of me to say and think, but she's literally moving countries! I live twenty minutes away from her now, the door has always been open for her, and now she just wants to come back here? To add, we could've spent the entire Italian race weekend together, but no, ma'am had to go to Bologna out of nowhere."