Never let her go

Chapter 29

Theo POV

My heart felt like it was going to jump out of my chest.

The fear was overwhelming. I saw danger everywhere I looked. I even went as far as to wonder about my brothers. Would they protect her? Would they watch over her? Would she be safe with them?

I felt like I’m the only one who could keep her safe.

I knew that was complete bullshit. My brothers would never let her get hurt. They would always make sure she was safe and protected. But there was a part of me that thought I was the only one who she would be completely safe with.

And it was very hard to ignore that part.

That’s why I made sure I was with her every second of every day. That’s why I didn’t sleep. I couldn’t let anybody get to her while I was asleep. I could barely stand those 20 minutes a day that I spent in the bathroom. It was the longest I could be away from her. A minute longer, and I felt hands squeezing my neck, preventing me from taking another breath.

Her hand in my hair and Noah’s hand on my back kept me from freaking out. I could picture it. I could see myself kneeling next to her bed, screaming in pain because someone took her. I could see myself running around the house, trying to find her, and coming up empty. I could see Liam telling me that she was gone. I could hear Noah’s heartbreaking scream. I could feel Ezra’s hands trying to comfort me. I could see it all and it made my heart stop beating and my lungs burn from lack of air.

“Nobody is taking her away, Theo.” Noah said, placing his arm around my shoulders. “We will never let that happen again.”

I looked up at him and saw tears in his eyes.

“She is safe here, Theo.” Noah continued. “Nobody will hurt her. Nobody will take her away. We will protect her. You are not alone in this, Theo. You are not the only one responsible for her safety.”

I knew that he was right, but I couldn’t stop the voice in my head, telling me I was the only one who could make sure she would be okay.

“Noah is right.” Lucy said quietly. “I’m safe and I’m not going anywhere, Theo.”

I looked at her and the voice only got louder. I saw that little girl who always called me Grumpy and tugged on my cheeks, trying to make me smile. I saw that little girl who came to me every time she fell and hurt herself. I saw that little girl who could make me feel like the best big brother in the world just because I was the first one she would go to when she had a problem she couldn’t solve.

“It’s my job.” I said quietly, wrapping my arm around her even tighter.

Lucy glanced at Noah, who made me turn to him.

“It is.” Noah nodded. “But it’s also my job. And Liam’s. And Ezra’s. And it’s Lucy’s job to take care of us. We are siblings. We take care of each other. We are not saying it’s not your job to take care of her, we are saying that you are not doing that job alone.”

“You have to sleep, Theo.” Lucy said softly. “You have to eat. You can spend more than 20 minutes a day in the bathroom. You can spend time with your friends. You can spend time alone. You can do things away from me and I will be okay.”

My heart started beating impossibly fast. My eyes widened. My breaths were getting short and shallow.

Spend time away?!

Lucy looked at me, panicked. She grabbed my face with both hands while Noah rubbed my back soothingly.

“Breathe, Theo.” Lucy said. “Come on, breathe.”