"Welcome to McDonalds—hey, wait a second..."
You smile brightly at the cashier in front of you. Jason Derulo.
"You were here just a second ago, weren't you?" he asks.
"Yes," you answer. "I wanted to see you again Jason~~~"
Jason recoils in disgust. "Listen here, kiddo, I'm not here to—"
"It's okay," you grin back, your cheeks flushing. "I know you're in love with me, you don't have to admit it. Anyway," you said, clearing your throat. "Did you know Harry Styles and Ed Sheeran are around here?"
Jason recoils. "Harry?" he says shockingly in shock.
"Yes. You know him or something?"
"No...no, never heard that name before. Are you gonna order or what?"
"I'll take 80 chicken Mcnuggets please," you tell Jason, then smile again at him. He looks at you as if you are a singular Cheez-It.
"That will be...$720."
You hand Jason a rectangular piece of green paper with the words "1,000,000$ million dollars" scrawled in it in green colored pencil. "Here you go," you grin.
He stares at you flatly then just sighs. "Leave. Just leave. I never want to see your stupid little swallalala face again."
You stare at him, your blue-green-brown-grey-hazel orbs glistening with tears as salty as the oceans in which they were cascading from. You fall to your knees onto the disgusting, vile, greasy Mcdonald's floor.
"Jason! After all we've been through?"
Jason turns, exposing his back to you.
"This love is not loveing savagely," is all he says, before beginning to glow faintly and rise from the ground. Jason seems to evaporate from existence, leaving you alone in the Mcdonald's, lying in a puddle of your own tears.
YOU ARE READING
Reader x Harry Styles x Jason Derulo x Barack Obama x Ed Sheeran x Zac Efron
Humoryou meet harry on your trip to london only to have all your dreams come crashing down by ed's silly shenanigans & jason's anger issues disclaimer: sadly all of this is satire (#1 in #jasonderulo ??? that's so silly) -05/13/23
