Serendipity

chapter 31

Hunter's POV...

"Princess, it's me .... I am your Mr handsome, " I said finally. She stopped waking and turned towards me. Her eyes held so much pain like I had betrayed her. In a way, I did!

I want her not to be a part of my messed up life. She doesn't deserve me. I tried to push her away from me as much as I could, but in the end, I couldn't. My eyes held guilt as I watched her.

"Why?" Her voice creaked.

"I ... am sorry, " I said the only thing that I could say. I never thought I would develop feelings for her. Yes, I had a soft spot for her, but I never thought it's love.

"Why?" This time she asked sternly, she looked angry. She took a few steps towards me and stopped when she was only two steps away.

"Because... Because I was an idiot who thought I was not good enough." I voiced my thoughts, and she frowned.

"Then what changed? Why did you start caring? If you really wanted me out of your life, then why did you take care of me? Why not you stayed away from me? Why?" She asked as she glared at me, angry tears running down her cheeks. I so wanted to wipe those tears, but I am afraid it would make the matter worse than it already is.

"I realized I couldn't stay away from you, I realized I couldn't push away the only good thing that ever happened to me. I knew long before that my heart only belonged to you. It's just that I wasn't man enough to accept it. I kept pushing it in hopes it will disappear but it kept growing and look here I am...!" I opened my heart to her, it was difficult to express my emotions but with her it's coming out naturally.

"You shouldn't have lied to me. You made me cry. You hurt me, you broke my heart... you..." she stopped as tears ran down her cheeks. I clenched my hand as I was unable to control myself. I don't want to be the reason for her tears.

"I don't like feeling things and you ... you make me feel! You make me feel things that I have never felt before. That I shouldn't feel, " I told her, my voice barely above a whisper.

"Look at me all I ever wanted my entire life was to be alone and one look at you, everything changed. I won't let you go, I won't and that's a promise. You are mine as much as I am yours." I promised her, her eyes widen at my words.

"My words start from you and end at you. Please don't leave me!" I practically begged her because I can see in her eyes. After this, she wouldn't want to do anything with me. I know I hurt her, I lied to her, but I never intended to hurt her. I thought being with me would hurt her more. That's why I wanted to push her away.

But I couldn't live without her, I couldn't see her with someone else. I can't imagine her being with someone else other than me. The only one f**king time I wanted to be selfish and look where it brought me.

"You should have told me all this, but you kept hiding things from me. You had all this time to tell me. You saw me cry for you that day, yet you didn't say anything. How can I trust you now?" She narrowed her eyes at me.

"I don't want to do anything with you. You are nothing to me from now on." She said with finality as she took a step back. My face paled at her words, and I took a desperate step towards her, but she raised her hand to stop me from coming any closer to her.

"No, don't!" She said.

"Kitten, please don't do this ... we can talk and I will accept your punishment. I will do anything for your forgiveness. Please.." I paused.

"Please don't leave me," I said, I had never felt this pathetic in my life. Even when my father left me or when my mother died. I have never loved someone like I love her. I don't think I can let her go. I want to show her my other side, she doesn't know that I won't let her leave, ever!

"No, Hunter! You have no right to stop me. You let me go once, it won't be difficult for you. I don't want to do anything with you, " she said and turned around, but something in me turned, and I grabbed her arm and pushed her towards me.

"No, no, you can't!" I growled at her. She can't leave me like everyone. She can't! She is the only good thing in my f**ked up life. I won't let her go.

"Leave me," she tried to pull away, but I wasn't in my sense anymore. I was back to my small house where my father was yelling at my mother. He even hit her. He told her that he won't ever come back and he is leaving us for good. My 5 year old self was hiding under the table.

My mother was begging him to take me with him even if he didn't want her, but he didn't even glance my way. He said he isn't sure if I am his son. He thought my mother cheated on him with someone else, and I am not his blood. He left as my mother begged him to come back, and she cried for him. She told me to go after my father and bring him back, and when I ran after him. He threw me on the ground, saying that I was a pathetic piece of sh*t.

I walked back towards my mother while crying, but when she saw me coming alone, she too yelled at me. She blamed me for my father leaving us. She said he left because of me. She told me that I was not worth anything. She told me that I would always be alone. She told me that no one would ever choose me. She told me...!

"Hunter, please, you're.. hurting me. " I came back to my sense when I heard a small voice. I looked up at her tear strained face, and then I looked at her arm. I was gripping her hard, and my knuckles turned white. I instantly left her and took two step backs. I was shocked at myself. I hurt her, I hurt her physically...

"I ... I... am .. sorry...I ... have to... go..." I stuttered and walked backwards, not once leaving my gaze on her arm, which I was tightly clutching a moment ago. I am sure there is a nasty bruise there by now and all this is caused by me. I became what my father was... I hurt her... I hurt her!

"No, no, I am not... my father, " I whispered to myself again and again. No, I am not him, I can't be him. I don't hurt women. I don't!

"Hunter" she was calling me but I wanted to move away from her. I don't want to hurt her, I would rather die than hurting her.

"Don't come near me... please, " I pleaded. She stopped and looked at me with worry. I didn't wait any longer and sat on my bike as I rode away. I have to get away from her, I knew it. It was a bad idea to bring her in my messed up life. She doesn't deserve this even if I love her. I can protect her from the world, but I can't protect her from myself. I have a dark past that won't ever leave me. It haunts me till now, I am broken beyond repair. I can't be selfish, not with her!