21 hours

3 hours

"hhhhh" I inhale sharply sitting up straight. "heyheyhey, everything alright?" I hear from the side, followed by comforting arms. "nightmare?" he asks loving. "yea" I answer, what the fuck was that, was that a dream? was that reality? "I have to go piss" I say after a moment of silence. toilet. sorry mom. I think to my self while getting up. What the fuck.

I open the door to the toilet and close it, just to slide down to the floor again. First I sit, then I slide even further to lying. I close my eyes. Why am I so fucking tired today, is it the plain? the traveling? probably, I always sleep when I travel somewhere with my mom, or when I go on a school trip with my friends, I also sleep then. So it has to be the plain. haaaaa, I love school trips. Cous' then you actually do something exciting, in class, but out of class at the same time. That is fun. And we usually can decide as well what we want to do which is also nice. I love my friends. And my mom. The day after tomorrow will be so fun, and I can just forget about all this. right? yea right. I can just suppress thous memories. And also, that thing just now was a dream. yes a dream! A Dream!! A fucking Dream!!! yes 100% I has to be. Shit like that doesn't happen. My mind was just all confused cous' I slept so much today. yea. That's the reason. And in the future, I'll just only fly private. And in general go everywhere private. And I'll tell my mom to fire all the staff, like all of it and replace it with brand new. So that I don't have to see them. Actually, I'll tell her to fire them regularly. I want a complete exchange of the staff every month at least. Especially our Pilots. And I want all the locks exchanged. My hands start shaking hard. I shouldn't get so far, I have to go back, back to the good things, back to my mom, my friends, my school, all the things that are sweet and nice. I breathe in and out. I check my pocket, I exhale in relieve. This is good. I have my phone. I open it, 5 new messages. first I read the one from my mom

mom<3

hey my little sunshine, I just wanted to check up on ur flight, is it all going well? the jet is now repaired and well take off in 10 hours, finally... anyways, I just wanted to ask you if you want to eat out on the day my lil bro and I arrive? or do you just want to chill out and relax the night we come.

-mom

I have to smile bright. I text her that I don't mind going out, I ignore her question about the flight, but I know that she'll ask me later again. I just need some time to mentally prepare for that. The next two messages are from my besti, who send me another video, followed by 7 emojis. The video is a meme which actually makes me smile. I answer the same emojis in different order back and don't read the third persons messages, who is my ex.

I start watching Netflix again. I must have fallen asleep at some point, when I open my eyes again it is am announcement from the pilots. "good evening my gentleman, this is a reminder that we will be landing in 3 hours." I sit up and stretch. I do not want to leave this bathroom. Then I hear a knock."hey, you have been in there for one and a half hour now. Sure you don't want to come out?" I hear Arthur. I check my pockets again, now slightly panicking. "I know that you know that there is not much time left until landing, gotta make the best out of it." his voice is getting passive aggressive. Fuck, I don't have headphones, nor earplugs. "common, don't you want to have some fun?" "chhhhhh" I hear in my left ear. Koi? He is hissing and growling, he gets louder and louder. "common, pre-" "chhhhh" Koi is hissing louder than Arthur. "come ou-" "rrrrrr" I can tell by the sound of Arthur that he tried to give a direct command, but Koi is louder. I can't hear the command, so I can't follow it. It is all getting really loud inside my head. I cover my ears and close my eyes. I slide further down back to lying. I just hear numb screaming. Words are exiting my mouth but it is not me who is talking. "Fuck you and your stupid kinks" I can hear myself scream, as if there would be walls between my mouth and ears. "I do not want to be part of this no! no! no!" I hear myself scream louder "you have to though, we are fait, you are my fait, it's either me ore nobad-" "NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO, I do not want to be with you! fait is a bitch, just like you" I have to smile a bit at that one, since Koi was the one that always encouraged me to stay with my ex because of "Faith". "you little brat, I have to train you, train you to be like your host, and we start with that. KOI COME OU-" "LALALALALA I am not coming out of here, I'D rather kill myself than do that or be with you." he screams I can feel myself now laughing uncontrollably. "did you hear that, he literally thinks that I would come out of here, no way. I will never, well, when we land I will, but until then" he laughs. This is a side I have never seen from Koi, nor heard. He has never acted like that before, he was always the scared one that wanted to hide and would do anything for anyone. Now he was protecting me, himself, whatever, this body, he was protecting this body. This is so not like Koi.