BAU
Derek: Fuck me in the ass
Emily: ???
Derek: I am SO hungover
Emily: sooo... u wanna get fucked in the ass bc ur hungover ?
Derek: Shush
Y/N: IM GONNA KILL MYSELF
JJ: Good morning to you too
Emily: 😭😭
Y/N: I LOST MY FUCKING DUOLINGO STREAK
Y/N: IM NOT OKAY
Derek: How many days was it
Y/N: 212 !!!!!!
Y/N: IM GONNA SHOOT MY BRAINS OUT
Penelope: Is there not a way you can get it back? 🙁
Y/N: IDK
Y/N: IF THERE IS ITS PROBABLY PAYING REAL MONEY AND IM NOT DOING THAT
Y/N: IM BROKE AS IT IS IM NOT PAYING SOME GREEN FUCKING BIRD TO GIVE ME MY STREAK BACK
Emily: what language were u learning
Y/N: FRENCH
Emily: girl u dont have to yell everything
Y/N: IDC IM MAD
Spencer: [replying to: "FRENCH"] I know French! I can help you learn, if you want. That way you don't have to worry about losing any streaks :)
Y/N: just marry me atp
Derek: HUH
Y/N: BUT YES SPENCE ILYSM PLS TEACH ME FRENCH I ACTUALLY SUCK SO BAD AT IT PLS I LOVE YOU 🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶
Spencer: I'm happy to help!
Emily: 🤤🍆💦🍑😫
Emily: Y/N and Spence
JJ: Oh.
Y/N: ...
Derek: My head hurts
Emily: grow hair and maybe it will stop hurting
Derek: Ur logic is flawed
Emily: bitch so is ur face
Y/N: HEKPME
Y/N: i actually LOLd at that
Y/N: chuckled perhaps
Derek: You can't just say perhaps
Y/N: that's not the phrase lil bro 😞😞
Y/N: its "u cant just say perchance"
Emily: now hes gonna kill himself out of embarrassment
Y/N: i would too if i messed up that bad
Derek: SHUT UR MOUTH
Derek: They both start with per so I'm GONNA confuse them
Derek: And I'm hungover as fuck so 🤨
Emily: 💀
Y/N: i miss him
Derek: Who 😭
Y/N: my 212 day duolingo streak
YOU ARE READING
criminal minds chatfic
Fanfictionincludes (list will be updated as story goes on): queer characters crimes/gore/violence (canon typical) jemily (will & jj r divorced) exaggerated personalities fem!reader (she/her) lots of sex references and swearing obviously mental health issues s...
