Forevermore

Twenty Seven

Before my first day back at school, I go for a run. It's my first one in a week, and it's very much needed. The ache in every single part of my body burns away the stress.

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Once I walk into the school building after a shower and breakfast, anxiety hits me like a brick to the face. I'm not sure how much work to expect. Ezra did do some of it, but I still have some missing assignments.

The thought is nauseating.

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My legs are shaking like crazy under my desk in AP Biology. Even when I see Ezra walk in, my peace remains disturbed. That in and of itself is concerning.

He grins at me, but I don't have it in me to return the gesture.

My eyes follow his walk to the desk beside me.

Once he's sat, he unzips his backpack and begins looking for something. I watch him with curiosity, darting my eyes away when he meets my gaze.

A moment later, he sets a chocolate bar on my desk, but I don't get the chance to even say 'thank you' because he's standing up again, walking over to Mrs. Janko at the front of the room.

The whole period, I stay silent, but through my periphery, I do see the way Ezra glances over at me every once in a while.

He wants to ask, I know he does. But if I start talking about how stressed I feel, I'll break down even worse.

On top of that, I'm pretty sure I'm falling for him.

That shouldn't be as scary as it is, but it only adds onto my stress.

Because a small part of me feels as though it's mutual. I need him to reject me so I can move on, but I don't know if that's how it would play out.

This is the first time mutuality has ever happened with a guy for me. In fact, if we were together, he'd be my first time for everything. That is also terrifying because he's had so much with plenty of other girls. I would just be another one of them.

I sort of spiral anytime I think about that or him or us. Which is why as soon as the bell rings, I ignore the way he says my name, and practically run out of the class.

Unfortunately, he's tall which means that he's got some speedy legs. He catches up to me in no time, which adds onto my stress–because who knows what people will say if we're seen together? My friends have long given up on teasing me about him, but they'd probably buy into the whole dating narrative even if it wasn't true.

And my brother–he would be livid. He can't even accept the fact that me and Ezra are friends (apparently I steal everything from him? I don't know, some guys are so dramatic). If he heard that we were together–even though we're not–he would flip out. I can't deal with another argument with him.

"Indigo." The word is followed by a hand on my back.

I swat his arm away, trying not to explode. "Clancy, I'm fine."

Through my periphery, I see him frown. "You have art next, right?" I nod. "The teacher is super nice, take the period off and come hang out with me."

My steps pause for half a second before I remember the amount of students pouring through the halls right now. "I'm not skipping."

"Well, you seem pretty upset, so I'm sure your dad wouldn't mind."

My jaw tightens. "Don't you have AP Psych next? It's not like you can skip that."

And then he throws his arm around my shoulders as if we're the only people here. "It's fine, let's just get out of here for a bit."

I throw his arm off and shoot him a glare. "Do what you want, but don't drag me into it."