Empires Smp High School Group Chat

What The Hell Do I Even Call This?

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Pearl: "9 out of 10 voices in my head tell me I'm crazy. The tenth is just humming."

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Scott: "After Tuesday, even the calendar says WTF."

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Jimmy: "I'm so glad we have brown cows, otherwise there wouldn't be any chocolate milk."

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Joe: "You should always knock before opening a fridge, just in case there's a salad dressing inside."

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Lizzie: "A successful man is one who earns more than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who knows where to look for such a man."

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Cleo: "A pessimist is someone who has spent too much time listening to optimists."

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Beef: "Don't you hate it when someone answers their own questions? I do."

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Joel: "My tallest finger loves giving people standing ovations."

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Bdubs: "Every woman should marry an archeologist, because the older she gets, the more he'll love her."

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BigB: "6:30 is the best time on a clock, hands down."

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Jevin: "I used to think I was indecisive. But now I'm not so sure."

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Grian: "A bag of money can represent not only wealth, but also massive inflation."

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Hypno: "It's funny how the cost of living is going up but the chance of living is going down."

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Fwhip: "Try calling someone just to tell them you can't talk right now."

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Gem: "I am a great housekeeper. Every time I leave a man, I keep his house."

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JoeHills: "Is there a connection between candy corn and corn nuts?"

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Doc: "I can tell when people are being judgmental just by looking at them."

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Etho: "The next time you buy a donut, complain that there's a hole in it."

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Scar: "A cookie a day keeps your sadness away, but an entire jar of cookies a day brings it back."

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Cub: "I'm not going to remarry. I'm just going to pick a woman I don't like and give her a house instead."

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Impulse: "If hamburger meat makes a meatloaf, then laziness will make me-a-loaf."

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False: "I had used up all of my sick leave, so I called in dead."

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