Alpha Shield

Consent - Abby

Filling their glasses from the pitcher on the coffee table in front of them, Abby felt the tension in the room dissipating. Selah's energy shifted. While she could still sense the underlying anxiety and anger in her scent, Selah slowly returned to the calming presence Abby associated with her therapist and friend.

After a few minutes, when a smirk returned to Selah's lips, Abby braced for whatever was about to come out of her mouth.

"So before we got sidetracked, you were going to tell me about you and Killian and why your scent was all over him."

"I was?"

"Yes. Yes, you were."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. Positive."

Abby sighed recognizing her friend was searching for a distraction before giving Selah the bare details of her afternoon starting with the visit with Catrina. When Selah wrinkled her nose at the mention of her other friend, Abby wondered at the mutual dislike of her friends, "What is it with you two? Catrina got the same expression at the mention of your name although her looks more like fear than dislike. You'd never met before, right?"

"I don't know what it is with that girl, but every sense I have says that she is more than what she seems." Selah answered shaking her head.

"She's been through a lot. I know she's got scars. It's why she's always covered up on her legs. She won't even wear shorts. She hasn't told me everything, but the panic in her eyes when she talks about not going back 'there' or going with 'him' is real."

"I know I can't relate to the things the Omegas in Sanctuary have gone through, but even with whatever trauma she's gone through, it's like there's a flashing sign over her head saying 'Don't trust me.'"

Deciding to let it drop, Abby continued, "On the way back, I saw Killian sneaking into Richard's office, but then Richard came down the hall and almost caught him. A little bit of a distraction hopefully gave Killian time to do whatever he needed to do, but he went a little territorial at Richard's scent on me."

Eyes shining like she was watching her favorite show, Selah nodded and waved her hand in the universal sign to continue, "Territorial Alpha. It's a little redundant but accurate."

Abby blushed and played with her glass again, "He picked me up like a caveman and hauled me off over his shoulder. I tried to get him to put me down, but he..."

"He...? What? Don't leave the pregnant girl hanging!"

"He spanked me," Abby whispered with both embarrassment and a smoldering heat at the memory of the sound and the feel of his hand against her backside.

"Oh." If a single word could convey a wealth of feelings, that word was it. Selah's tone was a mix of understanding, questioning, and an eagerness to know more.

"Yes. Oh."

"So, what did you think of being manhandled and carried away? Did it cause any flashbacks or anxiety?"

"Actually, the only time I felt anxious was when I spanked him back."

Silence followed her words, and Abby looked up to see Selah's lip curving up to a devilish smirk, "You spanked him? You? Spanked him? Hmmm... and what was his response?"

"I freaked a bit at first, but he wasn't mad at all. If I'd hit an Alpha back home,"Abby drew in a shuddering breath, "I don't even want to think of what the consequences would have been."

"Forget those assholes. Killian is a real Alpha, not those loser wannabes who are only Alphas by an accident of birth. What was his reaction?"

"He teased me at first that a butterfly hit harder, but then he offered to show me how to hit someone for real. Do you think he'd do that? Teach me how to hit someone?"

"Absolutely. Malcolm showed me how to fire a weapon as soon as we were mated, and I've taken self-defense classes for years. Stop avoiding. What else did he say?"

"He said that if I wanted to touch his ass that I didn't have to resort to violence."

A pause before Selah's laughter rang out into the room. Abby silently breathed a little easier as the last vestiges of anxiety cleared from the room.

"I'm guessing he didn't have your consent though? To spank you?"

"No, but he's an Alpha."

"And?"

"Well, that's it. He's an Alpha. That's what they do," Abby stopped talking and met Selah's now intense gaze with her own. Silence developed between the two women for a few minutes before Abby's breath left her in a deep sigh.

"Darn it."

"Conditioning like yours isn't something you unlearn overnight. It can take a long time. You might think you're over it, but then for whatever reason a thought will pop in your head out of nowhere. What's important is that you recognize it, acknowledge it, correct it, and move on." Selah added with a little extra sass, "And feel free to swear. It's amazing how a good swear word can make you feel."

Abby took a deep breath and gathered her thoughts before speaking, "Damn it. That is a thought straight out of the mouth of my father. It is not true because Alphas don't get to take things just because they're Alphas, and not all Alphas act that way."

"Good girl." Selah leaned over and patted her knee, "Now, consent. Consent is important in any relationship but especially in a relationshp where one partner is submissive to the other. Even more so when one of those partners has experienced some kind of trauma. Consent can be as spelled out as you want it to be."

"Isn't it just saying 'Yes'?"

"Depends on the couple and the relationship. With Malcolm and I, our consent is more formal and spelled out because of our lifestyle. As my Dominant, Malcolm needs clear guidelines and boundaries as to what I will and will not consent to, and he needs to let me know what his limits are. As his submissive, I need the same. In a healthy BDSM lifestyle, the submissive holds the power. I choose to give him my consent, and that allows him to act as my Dominant."

"Not everyone is in the lifestyle, so not everyone has checklists, safewords, and such. Honestly, I think everyone would benefit from the type of communication that's necessary for a D/s lifestyle. In an Alpha/Omega pairing, even without the BDSM side of things, Alphas are very dominant by nature. Their need to protect, to provide, to care is almost overwhelming sometimes. Without a conversation about what you, the Omega, wants in a relationship, even the most well meaning Alpha can take over until you lose yourself."

"Killian is concerned that he'll be too protective."

"He might be, if that's not what you want too."

"So if I want him to be my white knight and lock me away in his castle?"

"If that's what you want, and you're agreeing to it, then it's fine."

"Killian thinks that all Omegas want to be wild and free." Abby whispered thinking of her fear of the world outside of Sanctuary.

"Wild and free is different for everyone. What you need to learn and then communicate to him is what equals 'wild and free' for you? What does that mean for the two of you together? If you want to get an education and job then tell him. If you want to stay at home in your nest surrounded by babies, kittens, and chocolate, then tell him that. If you want him, and he wants you, you'll have to figure out a way to make your desires line up." Selah took a sip of her tea before meeting Abby's gaze head on.

"The only wrong thing is not telling him what you want. He'll either accept it or he won't. It doesn't matter what anyone else would do or has done before. There's no shame in wanting to be independent, and there's none in wanting to stay wrapped up in your Alpha or any combination therein. What do you want? That's the first place to start."