I Found Home

Chapter 9

Hannah

A knock on the door startles me as I lay on my stomach in my bed , trying to make use of my time by reviewing my physics lessons .

I am not nerdy but I don't like wasting my time just for the sake of laying down uselessly . Since there is nothing else for me to do like carry heavy boxes for some pennies, wash filthy dishes in exchange of food , babysit the neighbor's kids for a few dollars I could study to make up for the classes I skipped by escaping school earlier .

Although I love babysitting , I even consider it a hobby . I have always loved children , especially because I never was one and always felt curious about what if felt like , to be innocent and silly and uncaring of the truth of life .

I had to grow up sooner than expect just to survive .

Loosing that childhood made me who I am now , my personality is not something I chose , rather I had to possess . A tough façade and a clever mind were like a soldier's armor for me , to loose them meant to die . Now those armors refuse to come off , to free my body from the cold iron shielding it from the world no matter how much sometimes I wish to let go .

I look behind me at the door and shout . « Who's this ? »

« It's Britney , bitch ! »

Of course it is .

I sigh and stand up to unlock the door . Paget won't leave without seeing me , I learned as much about her personality lately and I could ignore her except that dealing with her quickly and sending her away would be easier than have her knock and knock and shout from the other side like a lost cat until I finally do as she wants ...

After what happened this morning , everyone is now trying to approach me as though I'm some lion they're afraid to poke in order not to end up in his stomach .

But I had a valid reason to storm out of class and school earlier .

It pisses me off , the way these rich spoiled brats look at life as if it's a wrapped gift under Christmas tree that most of us refuse to open so we end up sad and with nothing .

Their lives might be a gift , since they are born surrounded by anything they wish or don't wish for . Everything few inches within their reach . I only had that luxury for a few years of my life before life showed me its fangs . For me this new chapter feels like an inhale of breath after being pushed under the water by strong hands , and I am breathing as much oxygen as I can to keep me alive when those hands shove my face back in . Something tells me this isn't going to last . Call me paranoid but I like being cautious .

Mr Oliver's class was supposed to be an open space for all the conflicting views we have about any subject , yet he shut me down . He's just an hypocrite . I should've known better than to fall for his charming eyes , deep voice , charismatic personality ...

For Heaven's sake Hannah !

Paget meets me with her green eyes as she carries some books , then walks inside my room not awaiting an invitation . She acts like a sophisticated princess getting ready to sit on the throne one day and embracing her role of a Queen . Actually that could be true , since just like me she is the only heir to her father's estate . Only she doesn't have to take the initiative until after her father wishes for her to or dies .

Unlike me , who is expected to lead grandpa's company once I finish my studies , which by the way should be about economics so I can obtain a degree in management and business leadership . I hate to throw my actual dream of being a physician away , but what I would hate more is loosing this unexpected legacy and disappoint my mother .