Ink Stained

37: forgiveness*

許し

She didn't know how she knew it was Shin up there, only that she did, and that she needed to go to him. She needed to see him.

It was a powerful pull, a tug deep in her stomach when she saw the lonely dark spot of him sitting up there. Even from all this distance away, she recognized that particular slouch, the way the legs seemed to be swinging aimlessly, from when she had seen Shin sitting on a branch in one of the trees just outside the gates of Ayashi House.

She had been taking a walk just outside the grounds of the house, using the brief respite of having finished her chores while the kids were napping to take a moment for herself. It was spring, the trees vibrant with green leaves and birds wheeling overhead as they twittered at each other in their sing-song voices. It had rained the night before, and though the afternoon sun dried the mud on the ground to hard-caked soil, it still felt fresh and lively after the rain. Pai remembered that as clearly as if it had been just yesterday.

Pai was walking back to Ayashi House when she spied a glimpse of Shin's boot, and when she looked up she saw him lying back on a sturdy branch of one of the larger trees close to the wall, with his hands behind his head, one leg bent while the other dangled over the side of the branch. She didn't say anything to him because she thought that he might have been sleeping, since he hadn't reacted to her when she walked under the tree branch he lay on.

It had to be Shin up there now.

Or maybe she was trying to justify that weird sense of knowing that it was Shin up there by picking at what small things she could see from that distance.

Her chair clattered as it dragged on the floor when she pushed it back, standing up. Everyone sitting around her glanced up at her in confusion at her abrupt move, and she saw some of the other students look at her as well, but she ignored them.

"I, um..." her mind went totally blank for three agonizing seconds before an excuse presented itself to her. "I am going to tell Kurebayashi-sensei that I am joining the astronomy club. I do not want to get in trouble for delaying with it since I never did before the break."

"You don't need to do it now," Shuusei said dismissively. "You can do that after school."

"Or tomorrow morning in homeroom." Natsume added.

Pai shook her head as her hands moved aimlessly in front of her, pointing in the general direction of the canteen. She grabbed her jacket and dark blue scarf and began winding it around her neck, loose so that she wouldn't be bothered too much by it but enough that chill winds wouldn't freeze her half to death.

"I also want to go get some tea." She thought of the excuse hurriedly. "I will be right back."

It wasn't entirely a lie. She was thirsty, and she had finished her bottle of water over hours ago. Her throat was parched, but not bad enough that she hadn't been able to ignore it, which she'd done all this time so much so that she had even forgotten that she was thirsty.

Now that she remembered and focused on it, she swallowed some saliva as she turned and walked around them, her throat dry like a desert. She crossed the classroom with hurried steps, ignoring the stares she got from the other students with only a brief thought as to when they would get used to it and stop ogling at her every time she moved passed her mind. Pai glanced back quickly, but it was enough to see Shiori watching her with a frown.

Thirsty, she mouthed to her.

You okay? Shiori mouthed back.