The 6 & Davidson Series Vol. 5 Slickster's Big Haul" (Roberto Dilemma)
Nothing in this story is true. No one in the story ever existed. Alive, dead, anywhere in between…all made up.
Reading this story has been known to cause extreme puking, and shitting.
Women have been known to shoot gummy bears out of their pookie’s while reading this.
Plus if you are already depressed consult your Doctor before reading this.
It has been known to cause suicide. If you are taking medicine for restless leg syndrome, or to make your eyelashes thicker, you may go blind. If you plan to have to a baby anytime soon, or your nursing...oh NO, stop reading this.000OOOooopps...too late.
Stop Reading Now!
OK, then…read at your own risk.
"The Story you are about to Read is True, The Names Have Been Changed To Protect The Innocent" (something along these lines will be written before every piece of bullshit lies you read, or have Read(?), and will no doubt continue to read, For the rest of Bullshitness! Hey pal, This is a true story, But seeing everyone that was there to say shit about it, is either DEAD! or caught that brain damage that was going around during, "The War On Drugs" HA!!!
I'm the only sane sole survivor. I roballen2 say this with complete confidence. Having on a couple of occasions been checked out(?),by Mental & Medical Doctors to make sure.
Oh yes, SANE, GENIUS, humble & loveable as a shoe shine boy. I figure I'll plan a murder, or start a religion...I may be a little too sane?
No need to worry...stop staying up all night every night worrying about this shit....They were wrong.
Of coarse, they are the pig-dogs, that get their leashes pulled by a giant woman with her Pubic hair braided into braids, dipped in stash wax, and interwoven into the puppet strings of, "The Pig-Dogs".
(See my publisher wants so many words?, Ideas?...stuff people will like, so I'm dragging this fuckin story out into left field, then over to right field. And they are owned by a bigger company...that is so (You like this word? FUCKING BIG, That it's owned by ,'THE NEW WORLD ORDER"!
On With The Story....
Dave Cork, The Slickster, and Me, were hanging around “My” new digs.
Since it seemed like everyone lived there, but I was the only one to pay the bills….or buy food for that matter.
This “Hood” was called, “The Edge of Ruin”. Why it was called that is a story in itself. That is not the story I’m writing now.
Well for some Un-Godly reason, Dave decides to take a ride. Now he has this piece of shit,
Pimp, daddy, caddie, that he calls, “Two $Bucks HOG” . Because that’s how much it cost in gas just to start the Bitch.
I’m like, “Son of a Bitch Man, It’s 1:30 in the mourning, where in the hell do you wanna drive that pig bitch?”
Now that I’m smarter, I think Him and Slickster had a plan or some shit that I didn’t know about.
So we go get in Two Bucks$, and it smells like someone puked patchouli. SKANKY RIDE.
So we're cruising in the old hood. Where we grew up. Still knew people there. Most of them where now “shit-with-legs”. (not to say, we weren’t)
Earlier in the day, Slickster brought his nephew “Beanhead” a B.B. Gun. A pistol type.
It looked just like a .45. Except for the little B.B. hole in the front. It was in a box.
Had Styrofoam, and plastic.
Slickster was in the back seat, getting off acting like a robber/gangster, or some shit.
Yellin shit like, “Hey that ain’t your money, you wanna die for that money….don’t you got people that love you?” etc.
I’m in the front seat. I look around and tell him, “Shut the fuck up and put that silly mother fucker away”.
Slickster says, “Looks just like a fuckin’ .45? Don’t it?”
I tell him, “Except for that B.B. rolling around in it, that’s a dead give away.”
He promptly takes the B.B. out.
Now Slickster says, “Stop!, Let me out”!
I don’t even finish saying, “Where the hell you think your going”?
….and he gone. Cut between two houses. There was an alley, and then a somewhat main street.
I look at Cork, “Where the fuck did he go”?
Cork shrugged, like he don’t really know.
But I think NOW he did. So he shut ‘Ol Two $Bucks HOG down, (so we don’t run out of gas just waiting there for numb nuts to return….if that was in his plan.)
Then I’m thinking about what time it is. About three in the mourning now. The bars in that city, in that state….last call came at 2:30.
So I’m thinking, about the people we used to know that lived in the house on the corner.
Then I think what’s on the bigger street on the other side of the alley.
I look in the backseat…yep, Slickster took the B.B, Gun.
I tell Dave, “I think that it was last call, and they got their money from the bar over there on Surewood, and when the dude come’s out with the coin, Slicks gonna try to rob him.”.
Dave starts getting nervous.
Five minutes, stretched out to seem like five hours passed, give or take a minute or two.
THEN,!!!! BOOM!!!BOOO0000ooMMMmmm (Once more) B000ooooOOOM.
Three shots.
Dave looks at me.
I say, “That sure the fuck didn’t come from an unloaded B.B. Gun”!
Cork says, “What do you think we should do?”
I answer, “If Slickster doesn’t come running out from between them two houses in the next 30 seconds, We Get The Fuck Outta Dodge!!!”
Well…Slickster comes, dives right in the window…dives!…and he’s saying, “GO, Go !!!GOooo!!”
So….chump, I mean, Slickster, pulls out his big haul. The one he almost got shot in the back over
$23.00 Twenty three dollars.
Plus if he would have got caught, we would have been in deep shit. Just for being with him.
The get-away car and all that shit.
He’s disappointed. He says, “When this is all he gave me, I slapped him in the side of his head and said…DIG DEEPER Mother Fucker!”
“That’s when he reached under his front seat and pulled out a 9mm.”
“Lucky he’s a bad shot”, I tell him.
Now Slickster & Dave are talking about what to do with the “Big Haul” The Nest Egg….
In the middle of the night, in the middle of the ghetto.
I tell them, “just drop me off. I’ve had enough excitement for one night.
Now don’t go and spend that twenty three bucks all in one place…..”
-END- (for now)
YOU ARE READING
"6 & Davidson Series" (True) Life Stories By; Roberto Dilemma
非小说类Impossible Events...Strange People...Incredible Stories! These Events Cannot Happen Yet They Did! These people cannot exist Yet They Do! Stories to strange to believe! Yet All Fully Documented and Completely TRUE!
