Together (Larry Stylinson) ✅

Black and White

Harry's POV 

"So do you want something in particular?" I asked Louis, carefully examining his face to see how he responded. I didn't want to push him too hard, and I knew eating was probably the last thing he wanted to do, so I wanted to let him pick something he felt at least semi-comfortable with. 

Louis shrugged. "I don't even know what normal is anymore, Harry, honestly," he said, flipping through his phone. "I'm trying to look up 'normal dinners that people eat.'" He was laughing a little, but I could tell he was upset, and I walked over, motioning for him to put his phone down and scooping him up in a hug.

"I know it's rough," I said, placing him back on the countertop where our hookup had began not too long ago. "Well let's think back to what you used to like. Curry was your favorite. And you used to like fish and chips. And Italian. Any kind of chicken. Do any of those sound good?" 

Louis turned to look at me, his icy blue irises contracting as his pupils dilated. "You're just so cute," he said, laughing, embarrassed. "Distracted me." 

I smiled, cuddling up next to him on the counter. It was good to see he was finally letting his walls down and allowing me to see his feelings a bit more. It was a good sign that he might be able to trust me again one day. 

"But yeah, I think I could do chicken. Like chicken and rice?" he said, biting his lip. I nodded, encouragingly, trying not to look down at his bony torso. I wondered if he used to avoid looking at mine, or if it didn't bother him, it was just an unfortunate tragedy, and not some bittersweet, half enticing, half sickening muse. 

Damn, I hated eating disorders. Even after all this time, I could never 100% let it go the desire to be thin, to stop eating. And as fucked up as it was, I felt the tiniest bit jealous of Lou -- not because he was suffering, but because he was winning. Winning that fucked up competition with yourself to get as thin as possible.... 

"Wonderful, I know a good place," I said, returning my thoughts to Louis. I leafed through my phone for the number and then dialed the restaurant, placing an order for two chicken and rice takeaways. We also got two drinks -- a coke and an iced tea. 

"So, Haz, I talked to Zayn yesterday," Louis said a little while later. We were back in his bedroom, sitting on his bed and watching episodes of the Office while we waited for the food, which according to Seamless, was only 45 minutes away. But we both knew it would take longer. 

"How'd it go?" I asked. Zayn was Louis' long time best friend. They had done a ton of music together, and as far as I knew, they still were. But the ominous tone in Louis' voice made me think otherwise. 

"Well, we hadn't talked in like a year. I was pushing him away so much when mum died. He just wanted to hang out. Like even just stay in and watch a movie. But I wouldn't do any of it. I just wanted to be alone and cry. And so, the friendship faded out," Louis said. He looked a little bit uncomfortable and was inching away from me as a spoke. Perhaps he truly didn't trust me yet...

"Anyways," he said, clearing his throat. "I invited him over. I was losing my shit and going to purge, but I couldn't with my throat. And so I invited him over. We talked a bit and I told him my issues. But then he told me he was getting married -- which was awesome. I was happy for him. But he was making Liam the best man...."

Louis' face fell and started to wipe away tears, which were coming down his cheeks quickly. "Lou, I'm so sorry. That's awful of him," I said, wrapping an arm around his shoulder. We had both gotten dressed again, as it was rather drafty in the apartment for me -- and probably doubly so for Louis. 

I started chew on the sleeve of his jumper as he sniffled. "It's okay. He didn't have to ask me. It had been so long," he mumbled, shaking his head. "But yeah, he got offended and left. And he said he'd help me with meal check ins and getting a therapist. But that's about it."