Upside Down [mxm] [editing]

Chapter 15

There'd been a fleeting moment where Alex was concerned that opening the door would cause an alarm to sound. He knew the chance was about fifty-fifty, for all it should have been higher. But as he watched Julian attempt to elbow his way through the crowd, Alex didn't give a damn if the alarm sounded or if it didn't. Escape was all that mattered, that and freedom, the ability to run.

However, as he stepped out into the chill of an empty loading dock, winter just beginning to settle fully within the bulk of the city, Alex found himself grateful that no noise had sounded. He would have barreled through, regardless, but this made the route of his egress much less attention getting.

Still, Alex wished that he'd had the wherewithal to stop by the coat check and grab his jacket. He could get it tomorrow, or never, but in that specific moment the whiskey lacing his veins wasn't doing enough to fight the crispness in the air. Wrapping his arms around himself he attempted to hold in some of his warmth as he tried to figure out exactly where he'd ended up, and how he was going to get out of there.

Before he'd resorted to jumping from the concrete structure (his shoes had little traction and cold temperatures often lead to slick spots) Alex heard the door behind him open. There was no need to look and see just who it was; he knew. He had hoped that Julian would just let him be, let him leave, but neither of them had ever been very talented at doing what they should.

"Alex."

Julian's voice was almost torn away by a gust of wind that brought with it the scent of the city. That faded after you'd been there long enough, but now and again you could still catch a whiff of it. Piss, trash, and asphalt, mixed with an electric tang, exhaust, and the ever present layer of people. There was something comforting about it, the familiarity of it, and bracing himself Alex walked into it, heading further down the dock.

"Alexander!"

It seemed, though, that Julian wasn't ready to give up their impending confrontation. Alex could very likely run away from him, but Julian would probably just follow and they might as well get it over with. Alex was fast, but Julian had always been faster.

Setting his jaw and accepting his fate, Alex turned, blue eyes blazing as he leveled his gaze.

"What?" He snapped.

"What do you mean, what?" Julian was angry as well, sadness so quickly transforming into ire.

"I mean what do you want, Dr. Richardson." Alex drawled, overly polite. "How may I assist you tonight?"

Julian looked as though his head might explode.

"This was you, wasn't it?" Julian's thumb hooked backwards over his shoulder towards the museum.

"What was me?" Shoving his hands in his pockets, Alex did a horrible job of playing dumb.

"All of this." Realization spread slowly across Julian's features. "That's why you were at the house that day."

Alex remained silent, only the sharp flexing of his jaw indicating his underlying distress.

"Dick's always been good to me, but this doesn't feel like something he'd do." Juilian was defiant and accusatory, hardly the gratitude Alex had envisioned over all the years he'd planned it. "This has you written all over it."

"Okay fine." Resignation polluted Alex's tone. "What does it matter? It was me." He shrugged his shoulders, as if somehow that could rid him of the weight of all this. "Dick asked me to help plan something special for you, and here it is. Happy birthday. Fuck off. Leave me alone."

"Why are you mad at me?" No understanding laced Julian's words, just irritation. "You didn't have to do this, and you certainly didn't have to come."

"No. I didn't." Alex agreed. "But I wanted to. I wanted to see your face. I wanted to see you. Even right now, this moment, I want more than that. But that's our problem, isn't it?"

"Alex." That pleading tone of Julian's was back.

"Don't fucking Alex me Julian. All of this is complete bullshit." With each word, Alex's voice rose, becoming harsher. But still he was no competition for the constant noise that cut through the night and surrounded and shielded them. "Everything that we've been doing. I tell you I won't, we do. I tell you I can't, and somehow I still manage." Frustrated and overwhelmed, Alex tore at his hair. "This, us, it's tearing me apart."

"Please." Stepping forward, Julian reached out, but Alex stopped him with a look.

"Don't please me. You could have come back. You could have left him. Or told him. Or something, anything." A bark of laughter escaped Alex's lips. "I'm glad you love him. I'm glad he loves you. I'm glad you're happy. But I don't want any more part of it. This has to stop." His voice grew softer. "It has to."

Unable to be held back by a stern gaze any longer, Julian closed the space between them in two strides, reaching out to curl his fingers around the solid strength of Alex's biceps. "I'm sorry." His words were barely more than a whisper. "I'm sorry". Each hushed apology paired with a kiss, lips dragging first across Alex's cheek and then down his jaw. "I'm sorry." A pause for breath and then another. "I love you. I never meant for this."

Alex hated him. Alex loved him. And as much as he didn't want to be touched by Julian the pull was there like it alway had been. That electric magnetism that Alex had never experienced with anyone else and yet could never manage to turn off when Julian was around. And he'd tried. Oh how he'd tried.

The cold was gone, replaced entirely with the boiling heat of yearning and need. "Shut up." Alex growled, grabbing at Julian's lapels and turning to shove him up against the wall. Insistent, Alex's knee pushed between Julian's legs. "Just stop fucking talking." Alex was hurt and aroused, mixed up in wanting Julian and just wanting to give him pain back all at the same time.

It was more than that, though. Alex wanted to conquer him, to own him. An animalistic urge shot through his body, Julian was his. It might only be for the moment or the night, but Alex was the one in control. He was the one who had won this fight.

And Julian was offering no resistance. He did as he was told, silent except for needful whimpers and gasps of air. A shiver ran through him as the zipper to his slacks was unceremoniously lowered, but Julian offered no complaint. Instead he rolled onto the balls of his feet, pushing up to bury his face in the curve of Alex's neck, fully surrendering.

"You're so easy." Alex breathed, teasing as he pressed a kiss against Julian's jaw line. "Do you give in to him like this?" Jealous possessiveness reared its head as Alex's tone became low and husky. "Or is this just for me?"

Gulping in air, Julian stuttered out, "Just you." In that same moment warmth spilled across Alex's palm, and the bright light of a camera flash shattered the dim fluorescence of the supposedly empty loading dock.