Consume My Soul (On Hold)

Damnation

Damnation

I looked around as my eyes adjusted to the colors of this world. No one seemed to notice our descent from the high heavens. No one questioned our seemingly outlandish clothes. No one was here. The shaded alleyway obscured our arrival from human eyes. I could see bodies moving past the entrance in the light of day, indicating the way to civilization. Black robes that felt like honey that caressed the skin clothed our otherwise naked bodies. This was the usual dress of those dammed from Heaven. Angels still living in the grace of God wore white. And of course, wings. I winced, still suffering from the sting of my beloved limbs being ripped out of my back. Pieces of me were missing. Including my halo.

"I'm sorry Liliana." My voice stunned me momentarily. It was strangled and shriveled from the pain of knowing what's to come. But even more important, it dawned on me I had a voice. In Heaven no one spoke verbally for our thoughts were open for everyone to intrude upon will...I suppose that's how I was caught.

I didn't bother glancing at my angelic guardian's face out of fear of what I'd see. Due to God's mercy, she was sent here with me-to watch over me for God could no longer see me without my halo. She would be a direct line to the other angels as well; those who didn't peek outside the gates-which, I'd learned, was forbidden-would be just as blind and clueless.

"Ssshhh." was her immediate response. But there wasn't disappointment nor condemnation in her voice. Nor disgust. "We must hurry. You're running out of time." I nodded silently. I knew it was only a matter of time before the pain consumed me and I was no longer able to think straight. "Come. Our residence is close by." My residence.

"You shouldn't be stuck here with me," I said bitterly. This was met with another 'ssshhh' and a motherly hand against my cheek. Though Liliana would appear twenty-five years old to the humans, she was my mother for all intensive purposes. Her appearance had been slightly altered. Her hair was blond on Earth compared to the snow white it had been to camouflage with our surroundings; her eyes still gleamed sapphire blue gems brilliantly when reflecting the sun's rays; her previously pale ivory skin must've absorbed color, giving her a more human look. Her lips were full, cheeks kissed with the tiniest hint of blush, body slim as always-but no wings. I caught the looks of our male onlookers, studying her features intently as they walked by. I nearly ran into someone but managed to whirl around in time to miss-her. No, them. Plural. Two girls giggled between themselves, sneaking glances back at me when they thought I wasn't looking but I caught their eye every time. This made them giggle hysterically. I looked back at Liliana, wanting to retreat to the alleyway. But when I looked back at her, she seemed to be sizing me up as well. Had I too, changed?

"How do I look?" I asked her, seeing the brief widening of her eyes. She glanced away, revealing the golden guardian tattoo embroiled in her flesh on her cheek. I stared in wonder as it glimmered in the sunlight; the discovery must've been nearly seconds before her hair fell over her face, covering her mark. "You're showing," I murmured low. A guardian's mark was never visible to anyone except the guardian and their charge-but even to the charge, the mark was invisible only able to be sensed but never seen. Her eyes widened in shock for more than a few seconds this time as her hand flew to cover half of her face. She didn't recover as quickly as I'd liked, seeing as both of our physical appearances were drawing attention, humans slowed their pace as they approached us just to get a peek at the tourists. In these clothes, they most likely thought we were from Asia.

Liliana hadn't responded to any of my spoken words, saying "Come. We must keep moving," before fully guiding me to the sidewalk, merging with the sea of people and began walking in a direction with such confidence I had no choice but to follow her-with the inkling she had no clue where she was going. I observed our surroundings and was quickly overwhelmed. Such color splashed everywhere, leaving no black and white cracks; intense and passionate had been Simon's description of the humans of Earth. But I wasn't seeing it. They were moving way too fast, as if they were in a hurry to get somewhere very important. They never stopped to truly absorb the world they were in and appreciate it. The sun beat down, lighting up this whole new world of beauty once you opened your eyes to it. But the eyes of humanity were focused on the path ahead and the obstacles in their way. Apparently I was one of them. Numerous times I'd been shoved and pushed from one person into another. The latter always scowled at me and gave me a look as if daring me to shove into them again. Ten minutes and I'd already disobeyed Simon's laws. Law number four: Stay out of trouble. I smiled politely, apologizing more than needed and backed up, falling into step beside Liliana who'd been assessing our new habitat as well. Her guards were up for any demons or threats that would make my punishment even more difficult. I personally didn't see how that was possible. I was on Earth. Again. This was rock bottom; what else could go wrong?

We'd walked for exactly twenty-five minutes. The numbers of people rushing along the sidewalk around us dwindled until there wasn't a soul around us. We were in the middle of a neighborhood that hadn't been built yet. The grassy land, acres and acres, had already been bought and prepped for activity but nothing had actually happened except the creation of a small one story house on the edge of the neighborhood. The house was small indeed, made up of red bricks and cement; two windows were visible from the view in the front yard but I knew there was a window on each side, none on the back; to my surprise a chimney sat idle on top of the crisp young roof with pride; a green front and back door topped it off.

Liliana pulled out a single key, walking up to the door. "Let's get a look inside." I nodded and followed her inside, taking everything in. I was to fit in here. Therefore, changes were in order starting with our wardrobe. And I wasn't exactly sure a residence that screamed seclusion would help us with this particular goal. But I said nothing, looking around the empty room I'd just walked into. The house seemed bigger from the outside-much to my surprise. From the front door you stepped right into the foyer the size of a square closet and from then on was the living room, attached to the living room was the kitchen that barely had enough space to fit the refrigerator and the oven, beside the kitchen was the dining room. There was a hallway that led to three rooms. One was a bedroom, bigger than the kitchen but not quite as big as the living room. This I assumed would be my quarters. The sun spilled in from the large window consuming one side of the room and cast shadows in its corners. The shadows only reminded me of the darkness I'd narrowly escaped back in the clouds.

"Not this one." I turned slightly to look back at Liliana standing in the doorway. She gestured for me to follow her and I knew what was to come. The master bedroom contained more space than the living room and the kitchen combined. It was half the house. And shadows were everywhere, . A bathroom was cut into the east wall along with a closet and two windows. I was at the front of the house. "Trust me," she whispered, immediately moving to close the blinds of the windows and force the sunshine out, "you'll need the solitude."  I hadn't looked at it that way. In my eyes, she should have the grander room. I was the guilty one. I was the dammed.

But a sharp ache in my chest stopped all the protests that had been forming on my tongue. My demeanor spared no hint to the pain and it went unnoticed. The shadows in the room overlapped each other, trying to smother out every drop of the dreaded light.

"You need a name."  

"Cain," I said almost immediately, wanting to laugh at the ironic cruelty. Liliana whirled away from the window to face me but I'd already turned towards one of the darkest corners, hiding the scattering emotions on my face. "It fits." My back held her gaze for almost two minutes. I could sense how tired she was; hearing her sigh gave way to her sagged stance that confirmed my theory. She was too tired to bother with this right now, not wanting to argue on an argument we've been repeating since my damnation.

"Think about it." Her words were quiet and full of exhaustion; her hand gripped the metal doorknob as she closed my bedroom door, enveloping me in the darkness.