The Lies We Tell

Chapter 12

Ryan walked into my house for the second time. I still had a hard time believing he was here after dreaming about him for so long. The funny thing was that it all felt so natural to me. It was different, yet familiar. The newness of it was making me nervous - or maybe the thought of what I was about to tell him.

"Want a snack?" I asked, trying to stall.

"Uh, sure. Whatcha got?" He followed me into the kitchen.

I eyed the dirty dishes in the sink, suddenly very conscious of how I left the kitchen after cooking the night before. I was pretty sure his mom kept their kitchen clean - or, possibly, the maid or staff or whatever. "Chips - and dip, if you're into that - marshmallows, crackers, and grapes."

"Chips and dip." I grabbed a bag of chips and the jar of dip in the fridge and led him to the table. After a few minutes of crunching, he leaned back. "So, you were going to tell me why you won't let me kiss you?"

I swallowed a mouthful of chips and nearly choked. "Right."

He watched me nervously fiddle with a chip. "I take it that it's more than just how you were raised?"

"A bit more," I said with a wry laugh. I ran a hand through my hair as I took a deep breath. Telling anyone this story was scary, even now. Now that I'd gotten older and more mature. Especially someone who was friendly with the guy.

---

It was my junior year. School had only been back in session for a month, but I was already ahead of my classmates. Since our school used a weighted GPA for AP courses, I had a perfect 5.0. All of my classes were AP. I was the top candidate for valedictorian the following year. The next GPA in school was 4.6. I was way ahead and my parents were proud of me. My teachers loved me. The principal was proud of me. Why? Because that 4.6 was a senior.

The other kids, however, weren't as fond of me. I was brainy, yet I was lean and had good hair and clear skin and I was pretty. The only thing that I didn't have was money. Everyone had a lot of money. Well, except for Courtney. Junior year was when Miranda told me about the Goodwill shopping trip. They told me other tidbits about the popular kids, but I didn't really care. After all, we didn't run in the same circles and I had no intention of ever provoking them. We left each other alone and I was fine with that.

That was, until I was asked to tutor one of them. The principal asked me to tutor one of the jocks who had let his GPA slip below 3.0. Jared. It wasn't the first time I'd heard if him. He'd managed to outshine the senior QB and become one of the few juniors to play that position as a regular on the varsity team. He was well-known and, as far as I knew, well liked. He was the crush of nearly every girl in school. Really, it should have been an honor to tutor this guy. It would have been a dream come true for a lot of girls in my class.

I, however, was leery of being alone with him for any length of time. Some of those tidbits Miranda had told me was about him, and I trusted her. She'd never done anything to lead me wrong or harm me. In fact, she'd told me things that helped me out more than once.

When I started, I met Jared at the library. We sat in the back at his request. Our table was mostly hidden. I sat across from him. At least, I did for the first week. He seemed disappointed that I'd seemingly heard the rumors about him. He assured me they weren't true, that an ex started it. He claimed she was mad at him and didn't want to see him with anyone else. That week, I kept an eye on him. He was so nice and acted like a gentleman. It was hard showing him things from across a table, anyway.

The second week, I pulled out the chair next to mine for him to sit in it. He smiled at me. "You finally realized I'm not going to bite?" he asked with a chuckle.