𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐅𝐔𝐋²- h.potter

eleven ❝dragon shit❞

shut up bitch

you: where tf are you
guys???

mione: right in front of
you 🤦‍♀️

you: oh yeah lol

billius: such a silly goose

--

lila plopped down right next to hermione and pulled out a pack of popcorn.

"lila, where the hell did you get that?" ron asked.

"your brothers." lila simply said taking a piece and eating it.

"i want some!" ron whined reaching over hermione to grab lilas popcorn. which lila moved away from ron.

"ronald!" hermione cried. "you are literally breaking my back!"

at that the whole row looked at hermione and ron. which made them stop.

"lilaaaaaaa" ron whined. "please give me a pieceeee."

"fine." lila huffed and gave him a piece.

"thank you!"

bagman blew the whistle which made harry walk out while recording himself.

"put your phone down!" bagman yelled into the microphone which made harry quickly put his phone into his pocket.

"accio firebolt!" harry shouted.

"this bitch." lila groaned. "can't he just say accio golden egg?"

"you can't- waittttt." hermione said in realization.

harry took his phone out once again and recorded himself getting onto the broom and flying into the sky.

"rip to him i guess." ron said while eating popcorn.

"yup- wait, is that my popcorn?!" lila yelled, reaching over hermione to grab her popcorn back.

"our friend is probably not even alive and you guys are fighting over popcorn?!" hermione shouted, slumping down her seat trying to not get hit.

"y-you weren't eating it!" ron cried, while trying to dodge lilas hands.

"that doesn't mean to take it!" lila started but heard her phone vibrating in her pocket.

"fucker." lila mumbled while getting her phone out of her pocket

brocken bakas

harry: i am hanging onto
this castle for my dear life...

mione: why are you trying
to text us then?!?!

harry: if i die there needs to
be video evidence.

you: you are many things,
but smart isn't one of them

billius: i second what lila
just said

harry: ron, just stop talking.

billius: not you guys dumb
shaming me...

billius: i do not like this abuse.

mione: dumb shaming isn't a
thing ronald.

you: it might be 🤷‍♀️

harry: i guess we'll never
knowjdswnciuwbe

harry is offline

lila looked up from her phone wide-eyed and turned to hermione.

"he will be okay." hermione tried to calm down.

"oh i know he will be okay." lila shrugged it off and looked at ron.

ron simply just raised his eyebrows and swiped out of the messaged app and clicked on tiktok.

but when ron clicked on tiktok the whole school could hear it... why? because fred and george connected his phone to the bluetooth.

"DO NOT CALL ME HANDSOME IF YOU AIN'T GONE HAND ME SOME OF THE BADUNKADON-" the speakers blasted but before the sound could finish ron turned his phone off and sat on it.

"whose phone was that?!" bagman yelled in the microphone while fred and george who were laughing in hysterics.

"was it you two?" bagman questioned but before the twins could answer the sound of harry's broom was heard.

"YES! YES!" hermione and lila cheered while ron was still rubbing his temples from the mess earlier.

harry swooshed down on his broom and grabbed the golden egg.

"finally this bitch got the golden egg." bagman spoke into the microphone. "now excuse me, I heard they are making spotted-dick so goodbye."

authors note !
honestly this is a
fever dream and
many thing are
happening in this
but whatever ig