"Hello?" Pt. 1

April 10th 2016

"No, too early, go back to bed."

"It's eight am in New York, Soph."

"Exactly. It's too early."

"Get over it."

"Why are you calling me at this time of day?"

"Because I need you to help me out with something."

"Are you coming out of the closet and you need me to be your beard?"

"I think you and I both know that I'm not gay."

"Actually-"

"Sophie, stop bullshitting."

"Fine, let's get serious. What do you need help with?"

<<Hand me that telephone, Daniel!>>

"I need you to help me with my grandmother."

"Why, what's wrong with Connie?"

"Nothing, she just wants a word with you."

"Oh, ok. Why?"

"Don't ask me. She was gabbing on about something and then suddenly she demanded that I call you. I tried to tell her about the time zone thing, but she was pretty insistent. Here she is."

<<Ah, Sophie, sweetheart.>>

"Good morning, Connie. Or, rather, good afternoon."

<<I'm terribly sorry to have woken you, darling, but I need to ask you something.>>

"Of course. How may I help?"

<<What dress size are you?>>

"Excuse me?"

<<Would you fit a 32-24-34?>>

"-Grandmother, you cannot go around asking people things like this.-"

<<Oh, I do wish he would keep his nose out of my business. Sophie, love, I have a dress that I thought would suit you wonderfully. Of course, I haven't worn it since I was a débutante and it's been in the attic since the fifties. I never had a daughter to pass my gowns down to but I can't abide having them all sit in storage any longer.>>

"Connie, that's a wonderful gesture, but I couldn't possibly accept."

<<Tosh! You're the only one who will appreciate the craftsmanship that went into making the gowns. Granted, some are probably too outdated by now, but this one specific dress is timeless and I wouldn't part with it to anyone less deserving. Now, would the dress fit?>>

"Yes, it will."

<<Fabulous. I'll have Baxterley take it to be professionally cleaned. It'll have to go to London, of course. When are you next visiting? Daniel says that your move to America has turned into a length sojourn.>>

"I'll be able to make a flying visit in July, Connie. Is that soon enough?"

<<Soon enough? Of course not! I was hoping to have you visit frequently for Sunday lunch or afternoon tea. I quite enjoyed our talks before. All I have now is Daniel and Samuel. Oh, and Alfred. That dog is precious.>>

"Isn't he?!"

<<I'm told that was your idea. As was Daniel and Samuel finally sitting down to air their grievances.>>