why did i have to fall in love with you?

Chapter 3

I missed anoher week of PE and a day of school as i was in to much pain so i just went to the park and acted depressed for the day, that was yesterday. I was now sitting in my PE class and Miss Hamond was writting in her folder and sitting next to me, you know this is becoming a pattern. She sits down on the bench and writes in her folder, we have an awkward talk and the bell goes and in the end she sees me in pain and i know she is wanting to question it i can see it in her eyes.

I watched the girls play volleyball, something i liked to watch as they were all sweaty, oh god i sound like a creep.I watched them and right on cue Miss Hamond talks "so how come your not doing PE again?" she asked but this time she didnt look at me, i sighed "im ill, i was sick last night. Thought 'd play it safe!" i said and she turned to me "so why you at school?" she asked "my dads working and my mums away for the week, my dad didnt want to leave me alone but he had to go to court today!" i said and she blew her whislte and ended the class.

I walked back to the chnging room and got my shoes on and headed to english. We were given our essays back "sorry it took so long to give you them back, having a three month old baby makes you tired and leaves no free time!" our teacher said and he gaves us them back. There was tickes all over mine and a comment at the bottom which said ' well put, well done!', if only he knew how true it actully was.

I got home from school and niether my mum or my dad were there and i ran to the kitchen and ate some biscuits and went to work. I did my shift and got my money and went to the shop next door and got some pasta again, i was about to walk away to the checkout but passed a section that had a blank pad a three pencils.

I use to draw all the time but my mum tore them up with anger and i never drew since. I just looked at the pad and all the memories came back but i was snapped out of my daze by Miss Hamond talking to someone "mum come on!" she said, i looked up at the lane and saw her at the end and who i presumed was her mum at the cleaning things.

I sighed and turned to the pad and just looked at it and the pasta, i had enough for both so why not. I grabbed the pad and pencils and went to the checkout and paid for my things. I ate my pasta on the way home and when i got in my house my mum and dad were home and they noticed the missing biscuits and my dad never beat me so hard.

I woke up the next morning in alot of pain "happy birthday to me!" i said, today i was 17 thats right bitches im 17 and i only have one more fucking year! I was a bit happier today as i knew i wouldnt get a beting, that was until i saw my dad charge at me and kick my stomach and pucnh it repeatidly. When he was oen i just sat there trying not to cry which was proving difficult until i saw the time, i thought about not going but i didnt want to stay as m,y dad had the day of.

I went for a quick shower and frowned when i saw all the bruises along my body, arms and legs. I had PE first today and when the bell went i went into the changing rooms but instead of go out to the PE hall i just stayed in and drew.

I drew a girl crouching in the corner. How depressing i know but it showed my mood at the moment. When i finished i put it back in my bag and looked around and i saw poster for childline. It had a kid crying and the number. 

I just stared at the caption 'dont keep it inside, talk to us'. I brought my phone out and just looked between the poster and my phone. Why am i protecting them? why should i? they clearly dont care, who beats there own child if they love them, i certinly wouldnt, lesbian or not!

I looked at the poster and brought my knees up to my chest and i felt myself start to cry. I layed my head back against the wall and i looked at the poster reapeating the number in my mind               '0800 1111', i repeated over and over again and i didnt even notice that Miss Hamond had cmae in the changing room and sat next to me "howcome your not doing PE?" she asked and i sniffed and wiped my nose with my sleeve and i turned to her