Chapter 14

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Chapter fourteen
My favorite part of the day were those first five minutes when you'd just woken up, when you didn't remember anything that happened the day before or what day it was, when you didn't remember who you were or what had happened in your life. You were just simply.... there. And then life comes and hits you like a bus. Suddenly, all your memories came flooding back.

I had just experienced that. I rubbed my face and pinched the bridge of my nose. My school alarm blared through the air but I didn't have the motivation to turn it off. I flopped my arms on my bed, lacking all desire to get up. The thought made me sick, but I had to.

My breath was shallow as I tried not to cry, or scream, or both. I yanked my phone from the charger and hit stop. With the little amount of energy I had managed to muster up, I pulled myself up from the bed, my body slugging. I didn't bother getting dressed, or even brushing my teeth. Instead of changing, I remained in a dirty pair of leggings and a t-shirt that was so big, it looked like a dress. My hair stuck up in all sorts of directions and my breath smelled like roadkill, my face was oily and in need of a wash but I simply ignored it all. Instead, looking like a dead corpse, I dragged my limp body down the stairs.

The house was dead silent. I attempted to be quiet since my grandparents were asleep in the living room. My twin cousins were in the guest room along with my aunt. Natalie had gone home recently to finish tying up loose ends in California before they moved here.

I yanked two cups from the cupboard along with a serving tray. The plastic cups landed with a clunk as I threw them on the tray. I filled them with water and sliced a banana in half. My arms wobbled as I lifted the tray and carefully brought it up the stairs. I stopped by Momma's room first, knocking on the door to let her know I was coming in. I opened the door, gently pushing it open with my back. Momma was wrapped up in her blanket like a burrito. Her eyes were red and swollen from crying. "Hi Momma, I brought you some water and a banana. Let me know if you need anything else," I kissed her head and brushed her hair back.

She sniffled something in reply. I set a glass of water and half a banana on her nightstand and headed to Lucas's room. I didn't bother knocking but instead just barged right in. His room was pitch black and I could barely make out the lump on the bed that was Lucas himself. I laid the banana and water on his nightstand and sat on the edge of his bed. He was laying on his stomach with his face pressed into the pillow. His chest pulsated as he desperately tried to breathe in between his tears. I rubbed his back softly, "I brought you some food and water. You need to eat something,"

"I don't feel like eating," he mumbled.

I rolled him over so he wasn't suffocating, "Lucas, you have to eat,"

His eyes were just as red and puffy as Momma's were. His nose was covered in snot, and his hair didn't look much better than mine did. "I can't," his lip quivered.
I grabbed the banana from the nightstand and peeled it. I put it in front of his face, "Just one bite?" I begged.

He shook his head. I moved the banana closer to him, not saying a word. He stared at me, his eyes watery. "I can't, Lana," his voice broke slightly.

"You have to, just one bite,"

He sat up slightly. I grabbed the knife and cut a piece off the banana before stabbing it with the fork and putting it up to Lucas's lips. He slowly opened his mouth, just enough to fit the sliver of banana in. He barely had the energy to chew it. I waited till he swallowed, "Good job, do you feel like you can eat another piece?"

He shook his head, a tear slipping from his eye. This was the only day of the year that anyone would see my brother cry. I grabbed hold of his hand, "I've gotta go make the twins breakfast, I'll be back in a little bit. Just yell if you need me, or text me if you don't feel like yelling. Love you,"

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