Monsters

Bram - Age 18: Walking Home

Since Bram's confession months ago, in many ways his and Asher's relationship had almost returned to normal. They had sparred more, started hanging out together alone again, and were once again sharing and talking about the junk Bram usually tried not to think about--feelings and shit. But with Asher talking about stuff wasn't weird; it was effortless, easy. Letting Asher into his heart wasn't hard considering he already owned it. 

In other ways things had gotten awkward--but a sweet kind of awkward. Like those rare days their busses pulled up at the same time and they both walked off and their eyes met. Asher would smile a smile that could outshine the sun, as if seeing Bram made his day perfect. And, Bram, damn him, would grin back like the biggest idiot on the planet, all thoughts of playing it cool evaporating at the sight of Asher's joy.  

It wasn't just the bus-thing though, or the other times they'd lock eyes and the air felt heavy, magnetic. It was also when they accidentally touched, especially if they were both unprepared for it. It felt indecently good, if not a little risky, when they sat close enough that their knees or hands might brush each other at any moment. They'd also actually started purposefully finding "guy" ways to show affection, like fist bumps and bro hugs so they could touch more without the family catching on to what was going on between them. 

One of his favorite memories that year had been when they'd all gone swimming at the local lake together as a family. Bram and Asher had decided to "race" out to the deepest part where they knew Ishka and Kirg wouldn't dare go. They took turns splashing and challenging each other, which inevitably always ended in them dunking and dragging each other under the water before the next challenge. 

To the casual observer it was normal guy stuff. What the casual observer, and they hoped their family, didn't  see was all the skin-to-skin contact going on under the water. They hadn't planned it, but both had seemed unable to back away, unable to resist the allure of wet flesh as they slipped against each other: legs tangling, tank top covered stomachs rubbing, hands accidently brushing water-concealed skin. It had been the most insanely frustrating, blue-balls inducing tease that Bram had ever experienced. It had also been more skin contact than they'd had to that point, and he'd heard how much it made Asher's breath catch, his heart race. 

Bram had always had feelings for Asher, but knowing Asher reciprocated made every single glance, touch, smile, and word memorable in a way that was alarmingly visceral. And he could tell Asher felt the exact same way. His boy was a major romantic, and so bashful that flirting became one of Bram's favorite pastimes. He couldn't help it. Asher was adorable. And, yes, he knew that Asher usually acted all big-and-bad. He was strong, he was fierce, and Bram knew Asher was the Dreadful at his school. Still, Bram had a hard time believing that not everybody could see what a cinnamon roll his guy was. 

But...Asher wasn't yet "his guy". Not yet, anyway. 

They talked, they flirted, they spent time together, but Asher hadn't once in the last months brought up a possible relationship. It made Bram sad if he thought about it, so most the time he tried not to. Instead, he merely pretended like it was a done-deal, showing Asher what a good boyfriend he could be to him. At least he didn't have to be jealous of Asher flirting with anybody else. 

Bram would continue to take what he could get and enjoy their more-than-friendship. He knew that when Asher was ready for him, he'd make it known.

Still, as Bram's emotional feelings grew, so did his physical longings. The flirting sped his heart up, both in a joyfully romantic way and in a very earthy I-want-to-kiss-you-until-you-squirt way. Because of that, he often found himself "taking walks" and going to his secret place deep in the woods. It was a small cave almost completely obscured by bushes, and if he hadn't found it by accident one winter, he would have never known it existed.