Safety in The Form Of a Knight (Madeleine x Espresso)

8: Emotions

This chapter has a... small spicy event...  if you get what I mean hohoho 😏😏

Espresso laughed as he and Madeleine sat on his couch together. After many minutes, Madeleine had convinced him to take a break from his work so they could talk a bit. Espresso didn't know why, but he agreed.

"Thank you for the food, Madeleine." Espresso chuckled. "I didn't realize how much I needed that..."

"It was no problem at all! After all, I am an amazing cook. Letting that talent go to waste would be a crime." He added with an awkward hair flip.

They both giggled, and Espresso turned to look at his beautiful smile - that perfect smile, his gorgeous face... He could look at him for hours, and never get bored. Madeleine made Espresso feel something he had never felt before, which he assumed was love. He made his heart want to explode from happiness! He actually felt like he wanted to stay with this cookie forever, like he was safe with him!

"Espresso?"

He felt Madeleine's strong hand grab his wrist, which caused him to escape his daydream. They made eye contact. Again... "God, this needs to stop happening..." He felt his face turn red.

Madeleine tilted his head. "You were staring at me."

"Y-Yes, I suppose I was..."

"Why?"

Espresso quickly looked down, but Madeleine lifted his face back up to meet his. They locked eyes again, only inches apart from each other.

He felt his heart start to beat faster. A million different thoughts and emotions ran through his mind at once. "This is actually happening?? But... What is happening?! Oh god, what do I do?? I've never done this before... whatever 'this' is. Does he like me? What do I do??? Do I kiss him? O-Okay-?? Kiss him Espresso!!" He grabbed Madeleine's face with the free hand he had, closed his eyes, and jerked his head forward. He could feel the knight's soft lips touch his.

Was this.. Right? What if he was doing something wrong?? What if Madeleine didn't want him doing this?

He felt Madeleine's hand let go of his wrist and touch his cheek. He felt his tongue slip into his mouth...

He suddenly felt a sharp pain in his chest. Wait... Breathing. Espresso pulled his face away from him and gasped for air.

He quickly turned to look at him. "I-I am so sorry Madeleine, I didn't-" He got cut off as he got thrown backward, being pinned onto the seat of the couch by Madeleine.

"It's quite alright Espresso." He said with a grin.

Madeleine was... On top of Espresso. That is something he never thought he would ever think, ever. And yet, here he was. "This is.. real... What is Madeleine going to do to me?? He could do anything he wanted to me. Not complaining, of course..."

He felt Madeleine's hand move across his chest. It felt really good.. Espresso wrapped his arms around his body, pulling them closer together. Feeling Madeleine's body so close to his felt so magical..

A knock came from the front door. They both jumped and moved away from each other. Still blushing hard, Espresso got up and walked silently towards the door. He opened it a bit, and saw Latte.

He cleared his throat. "Hello, Latte."

She smiled. "Hey.. I'm sorry to bother you, I was just hoping you were doing better, so I came to check on you."

"Well, thank you for caring.." He was praying his blush wasn't too visible...

"Are you okay? You seem kinda.. tense." She noticed.

Espresso shook his head. "I'm fine. You shouldn't worry about me. How are you doing?"

"I'm doing better. Thank you so much for being here for me. I know how much this must hurt you too."

He nodded and stepped up to Latte to embrace her. "Yeah..." His eyes filled up with tears, and he felt her start to shake in his arms. They stood there for another few seconds.

"Well," She said, turning away, tears in her eyes. "I guess I should go now. Bye Espresso." She waved goodbye and walked away.

He waved after her before shutting the door fully. He sighed and started walking back into the living room. He thought about wiping the tears running down his face, to try and hide them from Madeleine, but there was no doubt he had already seen him crying. He sat back down next to him.

"Are you okay Espresso?" Madeleine asked, grabbing his hand and holding it tightly. "Is there.. Anything you need to talk about?"

He shook his head quickly. How had he just continued on with the conversation after all the... stuff they did happened?? Nevertheless, he certainly didn't want to rant, or vent, to this random cookie he had barely talked to.

And.. He was never really good at talking to others about his feelings. It made him feel guilty, even though they might have cared and wanted to help, he certainly didn't want to involve anyone in his problems.

"Are you sure?" Madeleine asked. "Cause I'm always here if you need to talk."

Espresso sighed. That was what Mocha said to him when he wasn't feeling well. Madeleine reminded him so much of Mocha in so many different ways, it was incredible. The tears started to fall down his face again.

So he let it all out. He told Madeleine everything that was bothering him. It felt awkward at first, but as the minutes passed by, he became more open. He told him anything that was on his mind, and Madeleine listened. He was so understanding and kind to him, he didn't judge him for anything he was saying. Espresso had never had anyone to talk to about all the things that were hurting him, even if he did, he was too scared to tell anyone about what was happening.

After nearly an entire hour, Espresso had let out almost everything he could've talked about. It felt so good to let all those feelings he had kept bottled up inside him out. It was like an extremely massive weight was lifted off his shoulders.

Madeleine held him close. Even though he hadn't said anything, he let Espresso know that he was safe.

"I love you, Madeleine.." He blurted out, not taking a single moment to stop and think about what he had just said. He held his breath. "God, why the hell did I say that!? What am I thinking..?"

Madeleine held him tighter. "I love you too Espresso..."

Authors note: Sorry I haven't updated this for an entire month, I have had zero motivation to write, but I'll try to post a bit more :) Also, I apologize if this chapter made no sense, this is coming from a younger aroace person who knows shit about romantic stuff- I'm really trying out here - failing, but trying. 🥲