His Sunshine

Chapter 17: Truth Revealed

Talia

I didn't get a wink of sleep last night. I tossed and turned in my bed trying to come up with something to tell Beckham. Anything.

All I could come up with was the truth, but that wasn't an option. It killed me inside lying to Beck, but I couldn't put him in danger. And if someone in this castle was reporting back to Father, I didn't know who I could trust. The only people I trusted right now were Anna, Lina, Maggie, Maria, Alexander, Beck and kind of Tyler. But only because Beck trusts him with his life. I still wouldn't say anything around him.

Anyone could be reporting back to my father and I couldn't risk the lives of my loved ones even if it meant losing them. It would break me completely, once and for all, but as long as they were safe, I didn't care.

At least that's what I told myself. Deep down though I knew that was not true. Without Beckham's love I would not survive. He has become my rock and I couldn't bare the thought of losing him.

Just thinking about a life without Beck in it made me feel like my heart had been drained of all blood. My chest physically hurt and it became hard to breathe.

But I couldn't let him get hurt. His safety is more important than my selfish feelings.

I wasn't prepared for the knock on my door. I'd hoped Beck would come later, but I guess not.

I don't know what to do.

Beck walked over to me and sat next to me on the bed.

"How are you feeling?" He asked, brushing a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Ok."

I couldn't look Beck in the eye. I knew what I'd see. Disappointment and shame. He probably regrets proposing to me. He'll probably take it back. I can't say I blame him.

"Talia," Beck said bringing my attention back to him. "I want to help you. You can trust me, I promise."

"I know I can, it's just..."

"Just what?"

I shook my head as tears burned the back of my eyes. I couldn't trust my words right now. They just wanted to spill the truth to Beck, but I couldn't put him at risk. He was more important than my feelings.

"Please Talia. Let me help."

Beck looked at me with pleading eyes and the first tear slipped from my own. Beck wiped it away, but another tear had already begun to fall. Soon, they were streaming down my face.

I pulled my knees to my chest and put my face in my hands, trying to come up with a solution. It was a lose lose situation. Tell the truth, lose everyone I love. Lie, lose myself.

I tried and tried to find a silver lining, a little bit of positivity, but for the first time I couldn't. Living through beatings and assault I found silver linings, but here I couldn't.

I felt hands grab my own and pull them away from my face. Beckham gently gripped my chin and forced me to look him in the eye.

"Talia Love, I hate seeing you like this. Please tell me what's wrong so I can fix it."

"I can't," I sobbed. Why couldn't he just understand that?

"Why?"

"Because you'll die!" I shouted in frustration and then slammed a hand over my mouth.

"What?" Beckham asked, dangerously soft.

I panicked, trying to find a way out of this, but there wasn't one.

"It's ok Talia, you can tell me. It's all going to be ok."

Despite the fact that I just told him he might die, Beckham pulled me into his lap and comforted me.