Meenakshi

PART 40

Shiva's POV

I thought it was the perfect opportunity for me to spend more time with my wife. I wanted to take her and our children out and show them the city. I went to the college and took a three day leave for the next three days but as I came home I was informed that they went out with her brothers.

I was disappointed that I was not the one who went out with her. I was upset with myself that I didn't take her out first. I was jealous. I was angry on myself but due to my blinded anger on myself I started taunting her for ignoring me which led to an argument in which she revealed the deeds my mother has done.

Listening to her, I was shocked as I never expected my mother to be so cruel. I had no energy left in me to say anything more. I stayed silent and seeing me silent, she too didn't say anything and eventually fell asleep.

I always loved my mother the most. I was always very protective about her. I always wanted everything to happen according to my mother's liking. I believed that she always has the best interests for all of us. Now I realised that she actually has the best interests for everyone except for my wife.

I hate people hitting children. My father hit me when I refused to get married which led me hating child marriages and hitting children. I didn't understand how my mother could hit my wife? I didn't know why I never noticed the abuse in my own house.

Not being able to sleep I just stared at my wife. I didn't know how my mother could hit her. She stopped hitting her after Vijay was born which means till she was 20, my mother hit her.

If I atleast tried to be her friend, she would have told me everything. I regret not trying to understand  her. Even though both of us were victims of child marriage, I had my family to support me but she had none. I had a career to focus on and also a life outside home but she had only one place where she was not treated well.

As I was thinking, she stirred in her sleep and turned to my side as if searching for something, she got caught a pillow and hugged it. I didn't know how I could ignore this adorable person. She looks so cute even in her sleep just like a baby.

I carefully pulled the pillow from her hold and threw it away and again she started searching for the pillow but as I threw the pillow away she in the process of searching for a pillow caught my hand and hugged it tightly.

The next day, I forcefully woke her up early in the morning and took her out for a ride as I knew that our kids wouldn't let us go anywhere without them. Our kids were born clingy. They wouldn't leave their mother even for a second.

The ride was exciting. That was the first time she sat behind me on my bike. I confessed her all my feelings and promised her to be a good husband and she was happy with my confession and promise. We later walked on the road hand in hand and also had a breakfast.

My children called me multiple times from their uncle's mobile and I informed them that I went out with their mother and that both of us were enjoying a lot. My children were angry that we both secretly left without informing them and asked me to give the mobile to their mother but I ignored them and cut the call. Even then they called me multiple times but I ignored them.

I wanted to do something special for her but I had no idea how to do. I remembered that she brought many shopping bags when she went out with her brothers. So, even I decided to take her for shopping.

I thought she would be excited seeing a big shopping mall filled with beautiful clothes and asked the salesgirl to show us their latest collection.

I was expecting my wife to excitedly checkout the sarees but she stood still. I thought my wife didn't like the sarees and asked the lady to show us more sarees. Then, I caught the sight of my wife's shivering hands which alerted me and immediately caught her hands and asked if she was fine to which she said, "I want to go home."

I was confused seeing her behaviour. I didn't know why she suddenly felt so uncomfortable. We both immediately left the shopping mall and reached home.

After reaching home, we informed her aunt and uncle that we went out to meet a friend of mine and later went to our room.

After reaching our room, I said, "What happened to you in the mall?" To which she said, "Nothing " and tried to ignore me but I was adamant on knowing about all her feelings and said, "Don't ignore me and just honestly answer me. I won't leave you until I get the answer." To which she said, "I was scared" and I said, "Why" to which she replied, "I didn't want to embarrass you. I don't know anything about shopping. I don't know how to select and even if I select they won't be upto your standard. I'm already an embarrassment to you. There is not one thing that I can match your standard with. Not education, not money,  I have nothing. Everyone in our village already knows that I'm not a match for and I don't want anyone in this new place to think the same."

I hated listening to all this. I had many relatives who pointed out that we were not a match for each other. I didn't want my wife also to talk like this. I know that education is important that doesn't mean that education is everything. I would have loved if she was educated but that doesn't mean she becomes any less of a wife if she was not educated.

To make her feel better I said, "I don't want you to impress anyone. I just wanted you to buy what you wanted. You are my wife you don't have to think about others. If it's about education, even my mother and grandmother don't know to read that doesn't mean I'm embarrassed of them and the same goes for you. If it's about money, all the money I have is yours." which earned me a beautiful smile. I understood that atleast for the sake of her self esteem, she should become a literate. I decided to do something about her education and I would definitely not go easy on it.

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