GTU #1: Loving Her Was Red

Prologue

She's happily performing with a big smile on her face, waving her hand on the crowd, swaying her sharply body making her fans go crazy. I can't deny that this selfless idiot have this talent that many people admire.

She's so successful in her life, she has her own clothing line and cosmetics company which is famous in the philippines as well as in other countries, she can do anything what she wants, buy everything she wants, kind, but annoying.

I hate the fact that she has this effect on me making my heart beat faster. I hate that she's always concern to me. I hate it when people looking at her with a shiny eyes and always fantasized her. I hate the fact that she's gorgeous enough to make people look at her. I hate the fact thatshe can make me feel home, safe and sound in her arms. I can be myself whenever I am with her.

What an eye turner.

I admit that I am one of her supporters. I really like her songs, the dramas that she is the leading lady. I always admire her. I admire the way she dress, she look so feminine. Since day one, since the day I heard her voice, I can't stop listening to her songs, watching her blockbuster movies, series.

Looking at her it was as if my world had suddenly stopped and regardless of the people around me, she was the only one I could see, she was the only one who could make my heart beat that no one had succeeded.

She look exquisite, a feminine, classy, easthetic, and luxury the way she dress. You can see she was actually born into a luxurious family because you can't see a scar on her body. She is very sexy in her dress and her abs are showing and you can see she is really confident.

She's very clever. I love sharp her memory is.

I can't deny that a lot of people stumble upon me. They say why until now I still don't have a boyfriend because I am very beautiful and have a shapely body but can they blame me that in the 25 years I have lived in this world my heart has not beaten to anyone. If someone did, that was 5 years ago.

I'm hard to love, cold, I always shut people down, I don't want people to interfere with the things I do.

Siya lang ang bukod tanging nakakaintindi sa akin. Kung paano ko siya itulak palayo sa akin ay siyang pilit niyang paglapit sa akin. Hindi ko alam kung masyado lang ba siyang tanga o ano. Lagi niyang sinasabi saakin na magpapaka colorblind siya para saakin.

Napaka tanga, tss.

She tamed my cold heart. She melts my heart whenever she smiles and look at me like it was as if she was looking at the thing she wanted to, there was something different in her eyes every time she looked at me. But I can't blame her because there is also a goddess living in this world and not just her.

I was shock when the camera landed on me and the crowd scream and I saw the frown on her forehead why people were shouting.

When I spotted her staring my direction, I hurriedly put the mask back on my face. I don't want her to see how messed up I am because it's embarrassing. I don't want her to see me here watching her performing on her biggest night. I didn't literally cry out loud, but I knew there were broken bits inside of me that were being crushed even more wrenchingly.

I don't literally shed tears, nor do I shed tears when I'm sad or happy. Because I have already finished the episode of my existence. An episode in which happiness and sadness are forgotten at the same time.

I never thought I would be happy until I was sad, so I don't know how to be sad. I don't have it because it is said that my heart speaks when I cry. I literally do, but it's too numb to feel its presence behind the long curved bones that make up the thorax.

I take a figuratively deadly breath and may doubt my existence in this complex and twisted universe. Every time I take a breath, I feel like a fight, and it's difficult to fight if I'm already lost.

What makes me human if I don't even cry? I still believe it to be an extant body as blood flows and drips, but I still have to question myself about the specific skills and qualities that every human must have. not. Should I be considered one if I don't mount these? If not, what am I?

"So, you'll scream for a pretty woman right there?"

She said and laugh and look away in my direction, I felt so nervous when she look at me. Parang hindi niya ako nakilala and I felt a pang on my chest. Bakit parang hindi ko kayang hindi na siya saakin nakatingin at ngumingiti ng ganito?

"For the person I love the most, this last song is what i want to tell you, if you are even here, i want you to listen to this song."

She looked at my direction and give me a small smile on her glossy lips and averted her eyes in the audience. I don't know why but suddenly I got nervous and my hands are shaking.

She grab her favorite guitar and she slung it over her shoulder and she smiled at us again.

Hearing the music made my heart skips a beat.

Loving her is like driving a new Maserati down a dead-end street
Faster than the wind, passionate as sin, ending so suddenly

"Of all songs" I whispered to myself. Slowly shutting my eyes. Trying not to cry.

This song is me

Loving her is like trying to change your mind once you're already flying through the free fall
Like the colors in autumn, so bright just before they lose it all

Our memories came flooding back, like a broken faucet in me. My heart are heavy and suddenly all the memories came back to past

"I like you"

"You like me?"

Losing her was blue like I'd never known
Missing her was dark grey all alone
Forgetting her was like trying to know somebody you never met

"Since when?"

"The day you entered my classroom, walking gracefully with poker face like a real super model"

"You can't like me"

"I already did"

But loving her was red

"I love you"

"Go Home"

"I said, I love you didn't you hear it?"

"J-just go home"

"Hindi ako uuwi hanggat hindi mo sinasabi na mahal mo din ako"

"It's a-already raining p-please just go"

"It's h-her right? Siya pa rin, diba? Tell me if you still love her"

"I s-still love her, I can't love you"

"I'm sorry" Tahimik akong tumayo sa upuan ko, kung papatagalin ko pa ay hindi ko na kakayanin pa, para akong kinakapos ng hininga.

(Red, red)
(Red, red)
Loving her was red

She ended her performance, and crowd scream and applauded and scream her name. I take one more glace over her on stage at the woman who captured my cold heart who has been watching her entire concert proudly.

She's right, loving me was red.

A colorblind woman begins to see colors and sees the true color of my world.

She's now wearing her EnChroma that she can see the vibrancy of RED.

And the was me.

LOVING ME WAS RED.