Help Me Understand

Chapter Five: Daya's Lament

TW: Fighting
Daya's POV:

I sighed to myself dramatically as I carelessly tossed my body onto my bed, grabbing a pillow and hugging it to my chest. I glanced at the clock, it's constant ticking starting to get on my nerves. I looked at the other side of the room.

I felt absolutely pathetic. How I treated Bosco. And how I berated her when she already was sorry enough. I was surprised she accepted my apology and was willing to try to forgive me. After how terribly I treated her, she still didn't hate me. I liked that about Coco.

I know I shouldn't have gotten so mad at Coco. She was scared and confused. It was scary and unfamiliar for her. I was scared too. I couldn't get mad at Coco for yelling. She was scared. And she didn't know how to handle it, and she just lashed out.

"COCO! For fuck's sakes! Shut up! Now you're the one trembling?! Shut the fuck up!" I heard a familiar voice call from downstairs. That voice belonging to none other than Willow. Why was Willow shouting at Coco? I was so confused, and I got up shakily. I crept downstairs nervously.

"And you! You ungrateful little bitch! Daya and I defended you, and you sided with Bosco?! You know, the one WHO SHOUTED AT YOU?! I thought you'd at least be smart enough to realize that, but apparently not. You fucking dumbass. Absolutely fucking pathetic." Willow berated, her fist clenching tightly.

"W-Willow, W-Willow, p-please, Willow, you're scaring me-" Camden whimpered, but then, Willow completely overreacted. She punched Camden in the mouth, the blow landing with a horrific sound. Camden was frozen for a minute, Angie was horrified, and Bosco was petrified. Even Willow looked shocked by her actions.

"D-Did you just... H-Hit me..?" Camden whimpered, her eyes holding an unmistakable look of terror, and her tone showed exactly how betrayed she felt. Willow didn't say anything. She was speechless. I can't tell if that was for the better or not. I to hug Camden, but she immediately recoiled.

"STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME! ALL OF YOU, STAY AWAY!" Camden wailed before dashing to her room. I heard her door slam shut. I stared at the ground before staring at Willow. She looked incredibly guilty, like she had just done something unspeakable. She did, she hurt Camden.

"You hurt her... YOU HURT HER!" Angie screamed, pushing Willow backwards. Angie was furious. I didn't dare try to intervene, I didn't know what Angie would do. Bosco on the other hand slowly crept over to me, wrapping her arms around my leg, every bit of her shaking horribly.

"Daya... Daya, she hurt Camden! Daya, I'm scared! No wait, Daya... Daya, you're not gonna hurt me, are you?" Coco whimpered, stumbling back, removing her arms from my leg. I stared at Bosco, absolutely horrified that she thought even for a moment that I'd hit her. But I couldn't blame her.

"N-No.. Coco, Coco, I'd never hurt you. Never again. Not after the first time..." I mumbled. Coco stared at me, I don't think she believed me. I didn't exactly blame her. I wouldn't trust me either. Not after how atrociously I treated her. She shook a little bit.

"D-Don't t-t-trust you!" Bosco shouted. I wasn't gonna deny that those words hurt, but I knew I definitely deserved it. I went to hug Bosco, but she slapped my hand away. I frowned, but I wasn't that surprised. The slap on my hand really really stung.

"Coco... Coco, I'm not gonna hurt you anymore, I promise.." I murmured. Coco shook her head rapidly. I frowned again. Coco didn't trust me very much right now. Not that I blamed her. It was all my fault for lashing out and saying all those truly awful, awful words to her.

"I have to go fix this..." Willow mumbled, going to go up the steps before Angie grabbed her elbow, turning her around harshly. Willow looked at Angie, and so did I. Bosco copied my actions. Angie looked absolutely infuriated with Willow. She shook her head, pulling Willow back with force.

"You are not going to Camden right now. You are staying right here." Angie spoke, her voice calm, yet somehow laced with anger. Willow frowned, but nodded slowly. Angie let go of Willow, making a beeline for the stairs, and most likely, Camden's room. I eventually decided to follow her.

The room looked as if a Tasmanian devil had rampaged through it. Countless items were strewn across the floor. Camden was using a razor and slicing her arms. Muttering the words Willow said to her as the blood dripped down from the cuts. Angie grabbed her phone, tossing it to me.

"Text Deja. Tell her I'm coming over with Camden and tell her to hide ANYTHING and EVERYTHING Cam could use to hurt herself," Angie told me, trying to get Camden's razor away from her. Camden eventually gave up on fighting, clinging onto Angie and sobbing hysterically. I frowned as I sent my message to Deja.

"Angie.. Angie, why did Willow hit me?! What did I do?! Why won't Willow forgive me?!" Camden wailed, she looked absolutely exhausted. Angie sighed, holding Camden close, picking up a stuffed bunny, Camden's favorite one, she was named Cuddles. She handed her to Camden.

"...Mine?" Camden murmured, tugging Angie's hoodie. Angie nodded, taking the hoodie off and placing it on Camden. I walked over to them, holding my hand out to Camden, returning Angie's phone to her. Camden shakily took my hand and squeezed it. I rubbed circles on her hand with my thumb.

"Cam Cam? Angie wanted me to tell Deja that you and Angie are gonna stay with her tonight. It's because we need you to stay safe. Angie is gonna stay with you, she's not leaving you," I told her. Camden looked at Angie, who confirmed that they'd stay at Deja's house.

Camden nodded, Angie picking her up. I watched as they left. I wanted Camden to be okay.