Locked Out

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Sunlight breaks through the window above and Dottie scratches at the door behind me. I must have fallen asleep sitting up. Breaking my arm to twist the door handle from my position, I let Dottie run free of the cottage confines. When she is gone, I hold my breath. The room around me looks undisturbed. There's still my bed, the table, the TV, and a busted kitchen.

No one came for me in the night, I guess.

It takes every ounce of will left in my body to drag myself to the shower. When I finally make it under the spray, I realize that the water is too hot. The whole room is too hot from the steam. I have to turn down the heat little by little until I'm basically bathing in frozen water. Wait, no that would be ice.

My brain tries to remind me that some of my plants should have sprouted by now, but the ache in my joints tells me that a long nap on the bed would be nice. I hover at the door with a hand over the doorknob.

"Water the plants," I tell myself. "Just water them, and you can sleep."

Each step feels like prying velcro apart. Nothing in my body wants to move properly. My joints protest, and my muscles weigh an extra ten pounds each. 

Each step gets a little easier as I grow closer to the little garden. The earth is still damp from yesterday, but I don't trust the water to stick around. All the library books seemed to agree that regular watering is key to good crops, and that's just what I will do. Watering my plants helps to soothe the tightness in my chest, but my thoughts still flutter back to Mia. Did she run away too?

No, that's right. The newscaster said that her husband is dead. Could that mean Mia is dead too and they just haven't found her body?

"The hell is she doing here?" Josh growled.

I had just set the table for Josh and Neil to watch the gridball match. Four beers each to start off, chips and salsa, soft pretzels, and some wings. The coffee table overflowed with food and drink, but I still knew the two of them would need refills after an hour or so. I tried to keep my attention on straightening the cans of beer into neat rows, but from the corner of my eye, a swath of warm brown caught my attention.

Neil had his wife gripped roughly by the collar. The sight brought something sick to the pit of my stomach, but I wasn't sure why. Josh had held me like that when he wanted to get off for a bit. Maybe that's why I felt uncomfortable? It's not proper to have sexual displays in front of others.

"I can't leave 'er at home anymore," Neil spat back. "She's a sneaky little bitch. Always running off or fucking with my shit."

Josh made a sound of disgust. "Just tie her up or something, damn."

I bit down memories of my own experiences at that remark.

"I tried, man. I'm telling you she's a sneaky bitch!"

While the men squabbled, I watched without directing my head in their direction. My hands were almost shaking as they continued to rearrange bowls and utensils on the glass-top table. The woman didn't bother to hide her gaze. A pair of big brown eyes watched me without flinching.

"Hey, Joy!" my boyfriend called without looking back at me.

"Yes, Josh?"

"Go put on that bathing suit you got from Mom, and then do some laps until I say stop."

I froze much like the temperature outside. It was late November and the temperatures at night already covered the ground with frost by morning. My eyes darted from the sandy-haired man to the pool and back again. Swimming in that water would be hell. Refusing Josh would also be hell.

I swallowed back the lump in my throat. "Baby it's cold--"

"This ain't a damn song," Josh snapped and finally turned his head to me. "Go. Get. Changed."

I could only nod.

When I came back downstairs in a hot pink bikini with tiny straps, Neil's wife was nowhere to be seen, but there was a heavy banging sound coming from the guest bathroom. The bathroom was more like a closet with just a toilet and sink, so I would usually prefer it over the master for some extra privacy. The kitchen chair propped beneath the door handle told me that I wouldn't be using it today.

"Hey," Josh's voice was softer this time, "you look good, babe."

My cheeks burned, and the warmth traveled down my spine. "Joshie," I whispered feeling more confident in his softer side, "it's really cold outside..." The muscles in my bottom lip quivered.

Josh's stern expression melted. "I'm sorry, but you can't be inside tonight." He cupped my face in a big hand and kissed my forehead.

"Damn you!" a muffled voice screamed from the bathroom. Then, there was more banging on the door. "Damn all of you!"

The warmth of Josh's hand left my face. The gentleness of the moment broke as Josh clipped, "You need to go now."

So I obeyed and headed for the glass doors separating the heated living room from the frigid night.

"You got some nice sprouts there, Junox," Robin shouts with a smile as she waves a pair of gloves in my direction.

"Huh?" I glance down at the green leaves just barely breaking soil beneath my feet. "Oh, thanks."

I had been so lost in thought that I barely noticed the carpenter pull up in a long truck. These thoughts are dangerous. Whatever happened to the Gibbens is not my concern. I have to worry about this. About these plants. About fixing the kitchen. Raising my kid. Fitting into this town. Staying hidden from him.

I have to make sure Joy Hornsby stays gone for good.

"I'm sorry Seb didn't let you know he'd be bailing yesterday." Robin scratches the back of her neck. "He's not much of a people person, but he'll be back next week."

Well if Sebastian is one person I don't have to worry about shoving smelly fishing poles in my face or marrying me off to their grandson, that makes him one of my new favorites I suppose. He can not talk to me for the rest of my life for all I care. That's one less person I have to lie to.

Life was so much easier when I just stood by Josh's side and looked pretty.

"Anyhoo, I'll get this lumber off of your property!" Robin laughs before setting herself off in the direction of the two trees cut earlier this week.

Squatting low to better examine the green sprouts below me, I feel my chest swarm with pride. I find myself grinning at the little plants. Having heard people say that plants are alive, I wonder if talking to them would be considered appropriate. Then, I remember that I will be eating part of them and decide not to get attached.

"Are your teeth chattering, baby?" Josh murmured in my ear as he pulled me out of the water with one hand. The other hand held a big fluffy towel that he wrapped around my shaking body. Warmth. Warmth filled every place he touched as Josh patted me dry.

I couldn't even nod my head.

"I gotcha," he spoke quietly before pulling me into his arms and against his chest.

My blue feet swung limp and tingly over the side of my boyfriend's grip. I noticed right away that the door to the bathroom was wide open, but Josh led me the other way, up the stairs.

"I'll get you all warmed up, okay?" he continued, and before I knew it, my body collided with the bed.

"I d-d-d-don't f-f-feel good-d," I cried.

"You're fine, Joy," Josh tugged the wet strings of the top free, "and you will be as long as you do what I say, okay baby?"

I nodded through the tremors in my body.

"Good girl. Then, we'll be alright. You're gonna be just fine with me."


I'm not loving this plotline anymore... I might end up calling quits? *Inner writer turmoil*

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