Chapter 4: Worst. Date. Ever

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Beta read by Paragon of Awesomeness

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-Rias's house-

Morning came, the sunlight streaming into the room, creating a warm glow that made a certain redhead frown in her sleep. The birds chirped outside the window, with the sound of nature helping her slowly wake up. 

As Rias rested in her bed, the girl's head on Archer's chest, she cautiously looked up at her Servant's face. While the Heroic Spirit seemed to be asleep, he demonstrated just how aware he was of his surroundings even when he seemed to be at his most serene, as his eyes quickly opened and met Rias' troubled gaze.

"Is there something wrong, Master?" the bowman asked.

The Devil broke eye contact with her Servant in order to push herself up with one arm, the blankets falling to her waist. Just like before, he didn't react to her naked body and she didn't mind him seeing her like this. In fact, her attention was focused on another matter entirely — specifically what happened last night…

"Archer," she began hesitantly. "When I gave you the name Shirou, it… it elicited a negative reaction from you." She stated, seeing his open mouth to speak, but continued before he could. "Don't try to deny it, your excuse back then was obviously fake. Even if we met not that long ago… I could just see that something wasn't right. Tell me, do you seriously not remember anything by now about who you are?"

The Servant of the bow remained silent for a minute before getting up from the bed. He stretched his arms for a bit before pushing his hair to the back. "I suppose I can understand your concern, Master. Now that I think about it, my reaction did showcase some negative emotions. But it isn't as bad as you might think it is nothing majorly concerning or a secret of any sort — you're just mulling over it too deeply in my honest opinion."

"You're dodging the question, Archer." She said sternly, not willing to let this matter go. "I understand that there are some matters you wish not to discuss, but… I don't want you to keep any negative feelings bottled up inside you around me. If something is bothering you, then I want you to be honest with me."

To her surprise, he chuckled. "Mah, my Master is certainly quite caring for someone like me. I would like to remind you that I am in fact a person who died long ago. What you see before you is merely a copy in a way of the original who resides in another world entirely. There is no need to worry about me, I am no human, Devil, or any other phantasmal creature that will exist in this world for very long. Such is the nature of a Servant’s very existence."

Those words shook Rias' heart, not only because of how dark they sounded, but rather how nonchalantly he said them. There was no sadness, no anger, and not a singular trace of bitterness in his tone. "Is this… is this really how you see yourself?" She said, clenching her hands while feeling her eyes start to warm.

"This is not a matter of my perspective differing from another person’s. This is the truth; one that is hard for you to accept, I see, but a fact nonetheless. I appreciate your concern over my well-being; that is a part of you I can even say I applaud you for having — given how many Magi see Servants as slaves or disposable objects. Though in your case, you're worrying about the wrong thing." 

Rias thought about what he was saying for several seconds before their true meaning hit her, and the heiress berated herself for not realizing the heart of the matter sooner. 

Ashamed, she lowered her head. "Do you… do you hate yourself?" the words came out as barely more than a whisper.

As silence encompassed the room, Archer turned around to face her. He sighed before putting his hand on her head, ruffling her hair gently. "Now, where did you get such a ridiculous idea from?" She noticed how he didn't deny her claim, how he was still dodging the question while keeping that casual smile of his. 

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