Fiona on Fire | ONC 2023

17. the return

Fiona was back in Ohio, in a taxi. The driver recognized her and excitedly asked for an autograph for his daughter. Of course, she politely obliged. She'd long accepted that she couldn't avoid this kind of attention, no matter where she went—to be known by complete strangers.

She had vague memories of her hometown feeling huge as a child, from her view in the back of her mom's car. Today, though, it felt small and quiet. It was eleven o' clock on a Tuesday, and the streets were almost empty. Most people were working ordinary jobs. Necessary jobs that needed getting done. Not like Fiona's.

Her parents, too, were at work when she knocked on the door of her childhood home. So she found the spare key where it had always been, hidden under a plant on the porch, and unlocked the door. She found herself holding her breath as she allowed herself inside.

Everything was exactly as it had been. Even her bedroom, which had been tidied up, was otherwise undisturbed.

Rudy the dog ran up to her and sniffed all the strange scents on her clothes. He was getting older now, with grey hairs on his snout, but he still remembered her, wagging his tail furiously and jumping up at her.

It was as if she'd never left. It had been seven years.

In her closet were old clothes from Target and TJ Maxx. They were cheap polyester scraps, remnants of the past and who she used to be.

Her gaze fell upon the old pictures in multicolored plastic frames on her bookshelf. In them, her face smiled widely, genuinely, with joy. She was surrounded by friends and family. Goosebumps ran up and down her arms.

In her mind, she saw her face in red carpet photos with a manufactured expression of sultry, smoldering allure she'd been trained to wear. She stood alone, caked with makeup and bound by uncomfortable clothes.

Memories flooded in of everything that had happened since she'd left: Waitressing her ass off to afford a dodgy Hollywood apartment with cockroaches. Eyes sparkling at the big lettered sign on the hill. Her heart racing at spotting a star for the first time. Booking commercials, then her first movie role. All of the excitement and heartbreak and terror—

Everything had been so new. She'd been so naïve, so innocent. Now she had to admit she felt a bit jaded, longing for a break.

It didn't matter if everyone would forget about her by the time she returned. Right then, it didn't matter to her if she never got another role in her life. Fiona needed a change.

A lot of darkness had invaded her life in LA. She had constantly overworked herself, people had tried to take advantage of her, and she had looked to substances as a desperate way to cope. A very unwell fan's admiration had festered into obsession.

She decided then that she had achieved her dream. She had made it happen. That meant it was time to find other dreams.

Jack was due to arrive at the airport in half an hour, so she called another car. She'd already checked into the hotel they were staying at. She was glad she'd decided not to stay in her parent's home because it made her head spin with memories. Her feet didn't feel quite stable on those floors, as if she were at sea in choppy waters, her stomach churning.

She went into the airport wearing discreet sunglasses and a baseball cap. When she saw him, though, she forgot about going incognito.

"Jack!" Fiona shouted, and began to run as fast as she could without barreling into people.

"Fiona!" he called, a huge grin on his face. He closed the distance between them and wrapped her up in a massive hug, lifting her feet of the ground.

"It feels like it's been a long time," she said, breathless.

"It has. It's been a year since we met."

"I've missed you."

"Me too." He stared into her eyes as if searching for something.

"You've packed a suit and everything?" Fiona's face suddenly felt hot.

"Of course. My very best."

"Maybe we can take your luggage to the hotel and then grab a bite to eat?"

"Sure. I'd love a little tour of your hometown. People seem really friendly here."

They took off through the airport, a nervous energy overtaking Fiona. After a few more car rides and a stop at the hotel, they were walking the streets she'd grown up riding bikes on. It felt like a collision of worlds having Jack here.

"It always amazes me how new and spacious everything is here. In Ireland, we have lots of very old buildings, and they're usually packed together. Except in the country where it's all fields, hedgerows, and sheep. What did you do for fun growing up here?"

"Typical stuff, I guess, like going to the playground near our house. It's a pretty dull town. Once you're a teenager, everyone just wanted to get out."

"And you did too? Across the country?"

"I didn't actually have a plan to go to college or leave. Everyone told me it was unrealistic to want to act. I didn't decide to leave until I was fed up one day and flipped a coin."

"You just...flipped a coin to make a major life decision?" He grinned at her.

"Yeah. It's not like I make a habit of it. I was so torn. It felt like I needed something to tell me what to do."

"So if the coin had landed the other way, you genuinely never would have moved to Los Angeles?"

"Yes, I think so." She stared at the sidewalk below, dodging cracks in the pavement.

"And we never would have met, and you wouldn't have acted at all?"

"That's the idea. Two paths diverged, I guess. Maybe in another universe, it landed tails up and that Fiona is living out her life here."

"Fiona." He stopped her, holding his arm out. His face was dazzling in the sun, his blue eyes almost seeming to glow. "I'm so, so glad that coin landed on heads."

She looked at him and was almost leveled by the sincerity in his eyes. She fell forward into his arms, securing her against his chest. The gentle warmth of the sun embraced them both, all the complications of fame irrelevant under the vast small-town sky.