Fightclub

fifty-six | goodbye

Trigger warnings: ⚠️⚠️⚠️ past trauma and PTSD + violence & torture

𝐒𝐨𝐧𝐠: 𝐃𝐞𝐚𝐧 𝐋𝐞𝐰𝐢𝐬 - 𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐃𝐨 𝐈 𝐒𝐚𝐲 𝐆𝐨𝐨𝐝𝐛𝐲𝐞

"It's strange that people fear death. Life hurts more than death."

Those were the last words Imani uttered before she took her last breath. I felt her die. I felt her slip away in my arms. She was there, in my arms. I was holding her and then... nothing. Her chest didn't rise. Her eyes didn't flutter open.

Her heart stopped.

Frozen in time.

The memory of her had created a primary residence in my mind. Or rather I forced that memory to stay. It was my fault she died. It was me who Flynn's men wanted.

It was I who had started to forget. I found myself wondering what her voice was like. And that led me in a tornado of thoughts and overthinking after which I came to the conclusion that I was losing her in more ways than one.

And if I lost that memory then I would have nothing at all. Nothing to remind me of her.

And I didn't want to forget. Not her. Not now. Not ever.

I found myself losing her to the cost of my happiness.

Why should I be happy?

She was dead.

And I was here.

And she was dead.

And a woman with the same pair of eyes as the stone gem around my neck was staring at me in question.

Her hair was braided and wrapped in a headscarf. The countless nights Rose and I stayed up at night braiding Imani's hair swarmed my brain.

She looked older. And my brain didn't have the ability to comprehend what was happening right now. All I wanted was nothing more than to have her in my arms again.

The next time I woke up after that dreadful night I didn't have her in my arms. Her body was nowhere to be found. Should I have looked for her?

But I felt her die.

I felt her slip away.

She was gone.

But if the woman was her...

I had left her.

I gave up on her.

I-

"Hi, I'm Emory, nice to meet you, Leo has told me a lot about you" Imani- Emory said with a small smile on her face. She even had the same left dimple. I had a right one and Rosalyn had both.