An Inconvenient Attachment

Chapter 28

Delaney 

Hearing the news broke my heart, and hearing Frankie's voice hurt even more. She blames herself for it and I'm not sure I can change her mind. I've known for a couple of days that they both weren't happy but I still think that it was still hard for both of them to hear. I also knew that today was the first time in a while that Willy and Frankie spent time alone together. 

Frankie couldn't stop apologizing to me the whole night that I was texting her. I had gone home with my brothers last night after we knew Willy had made it out of surgery successfully. It killed me not to tell her he may never be the same, I sort of just hoped she would understand that. He may never walk again or remember his twin sister. 

I now sit next to his bed, channel surfing on the crappy hospital TV. At home last night I slept in his bed, I guess it put my brain at ease. He's not awake and the doctor said he wouldn't be for another couple of hours yet but it's just me and him. I talk to him now and again even if I look insane but I don't care because even my sleeping brother's body is good company. 

Willy wakes up later on when it's him and I again because Mum went to buy some lunch and the boys have gone for a walk. I don't what to do straight away but I buzz the nurse and she walks in not long later.

"Oh! He's awake. Hello William, my name is Stacy and I'm your nurse for the moment," she introduces herself and makes sure everything is intact, "I will have a chat with your Mum when she gets back about what's going to happen but we'll leave you be whilst you get your bearings."

Once she leaves the room he's quick to look at me and I see a face of question. "Hey, Willy, it's me, your twin sister Delaney." I'm not sure what to do and I don't stress him out. Mum walks in shortly after and the nurse is not far behind her. She conducts a couple of tests on him; he's not talking much and his memory is hazing but not completely gone. Willy doesn't remember what happened in the accident or much of what he was doing leading up to it. 

What's the biggest concern for him is his movement. Willy had to be carried by Dad to go to the bathroom earlier. It's hard on him, not being able to move just like that; he was quite upset about it earlier and it's probably when it hit everyone that it's a long road ahead. 

I sit outside in the Hospital gardens whilst Frankie visits; it was best to leave them be. She comes out later with tear stained checks, "He's not really ok, is he?"

My Mums the one to answer, "No, baby, but he will get better. One day," she gives Frankie one of her signature hugs before walking up to Dad who has became a whole support system for my Mum. Similar to Gus to me, he's been great and I can tell he's hurting for his best friend. 

"What happened up there, Franks?" I ask softly because I don't want to push boundaries. 

She answers after a second, "He doesn't remember what happened with us; he thinks we're still together. We both cried and barely could talk, but he tried and he tried so hard. He said it was ok if I didn't love him anymore and I think it's because he has this whole picture in his head that that bed up there is the rest of his life. I told him what happened, the fight, how sad and mad we were at each other but also ourselves. He asked if I thought it was my fault. Now I think there's nothing that really could be blamed, it was purely coincidental that it happened to him."

"We may never know how he swerved off the road but whatever happened I-" 

Nates panicked voice echoes out throw the garden. "DELANEY!" He's running up to us and nearly trips over his own feet to get to me.  Nates out of breath and panicking. 

"Nate what is it?"

"Oh god Del. He-h- he just stopped breathing. Mum was talking to him an-and then he shut his eyes, we thought he was tired but he f-flatlined."

I jump up, "Wha-what? Surely their, like, helping or something?" My words are a mile a minute so are my steps. I turn back and see my brother not too far behind, tears streaming down his face. 

Frankie's still at the seat crying into her hands and now the feeling hits me like a train. Every moment that I've ever had with my brother are just memories, I'll never have another birthday with him, I'll never share another Christmas or Thanksgiving, and I'll never have my second half next to me ever again. 

8 days later

"And just like that I never held a deep 2am conversation with my brother again. We shared  about 6450 breakfasts. Had hundreds of brother sister fights, had millions of 'I'm sorry' hugs and I hope you don't hate me texts. Went on three double dates whilst dating the loves of our lives. I travelled to thousands of his hockey games and watched him practise for hours over and over in our backyard. 

If you couldn't tell Willy was my second half and my first partner in crime. Watching him grow up into the man that he could have been is someone gone too soon and now he would hate to see all these people crying over him even though it would be his entire personality for the rest of his life. So whilst I've had a week to fully accept this, I don't think I ever will because my brother William Hughes was the most loveable person anyone could ever be."

Mum asked me to deliver the eulogy however as a part of that all of the important people in his life stood up and remembered his name. The crowd that gathered is a much bigger one then we expected, we had decided not to make it a private ceremony because Willy was loud, loving and he knew people in every corner of the world; we would never get around to naming them all but a more private ceremony was held yesterday. 

This past week was maybe one of the worst in my life. Mum and I have slept in his bed, Dad will sometimes sneak in and not so quietly cry himself to sleep on the floor; the third night I made room for him. Nates on a spiral and I kinda hate him for it and that makes me feel like a bitch. Matty doesn't talk much to anyone and Mum lies in her bed and goes through his phone everyday just to have a part of him. I just sit on the beach behind our house and live vicariously through the wind that blows through my hair. 

Rosie has cooked a billion and one things for us to eat and not one of them have even a bite out of them. She tries to at least get my Mum out on the porch but that will last about five minutes before she bursts into tears. 

I haven't spoke to Gus in about six days. We're both drowning in our own grief. Frankie gave a speech at today's ceremony but she could barely get through it. We both decide it is best if we talk to people instead sit there with our thoughts. 

We speak to his teachers, past and present. To teammates, friends, classmates, rivals. Probably a bit too soon but Willy would be rolling in his grave to see Hugo Laurent here. I don't see Gus at the ceremony, it's likely that there was too many people to see him. 

It's late that night and it's the first time I cry in my own bed and when I fall asleep it's like my brother is still here. 

🥲 It's really bittersweet this chapter. I hope that everyone's doing ok after this one because it hurt, ALOT. From now on there will be a couple of time skips in the future that will wrap this baby up, Gus and Delly are my first and I'm so so so proud.

Song - Bigger Than The Whole Sky (or any sad taylor song ever)

Words (of pure heartbreak) - 1362