Someone, Somewhere - Ben Bruce.

Oh the things that I could do

I don't know why I was feeling so awkward, I'd fallen asleep in the same place as him so many times before, even when in other relationships, but this time was just depressing. Like he didn't really want me there. Even though part of me knew he did as well. He wasn't acting any different at all, he just wasn't sleeping well, and for that I blamed myself.

I chose to sleep on the sofa that night, Ben actually seemed upset by that and kissed me before going to bed, I could hear him shifting about a lot all night, hence I knew he hadn't slept a lot. I checked my phone. 05:42 flashed onto my screen, the brightness blinding me in the night shadows. His feet sounded on his floor once again, as I listened to him travelling around above me

A small plodding noise sounded on the stairs and slowly drew closer, I was tired and it took me far too long to realise he was coming down here. The door opened a few inches with a creak, peering around the corner I could see Ben's vibrant eyes.

“Come in.” I ushered quietly, letting him know I was awake.

“The room or you? I know what I'd prefer.” Already started talking dirty, and he knew how much I loved him doing that. How it made me tingle with anticipation.

He smirked and slid into the room, sitting at my feet.

“I couldn't sleep.” He said, showing how tired he really was.

“I heard.”

“Pervert. Anyway, I was just thinking. I need to be held.”

Brilliant, tells me he doesn't have feelings for me, which caused me to feel awkward, and now he's getting sympathy and wants me to hug him. I was actually kind of annoyed he didn't know my feelings.

Nether the less. I relented and moved over, giving him space to lie down. His back pushed firmly against me I swung one arm around his waist and the other became his pillow. Fuck it if I have a dead arm, I want him to sleep. I moved the arm around him to his head, and slowly stroked his hair, as you would a child. Lying there for maybe ten minutes, I began to noticed myself being soothed and becoming tired, then saw that Ben was already asleep. Looking beautiful, as always.

Deciding a lie in wouldn't be such a bad idea, I snuggled closer to him and let myself drift off to sleep. Feeling so much better with him, even though part of me was still annoyed.

“You mean a lot more to me than you think.” I whispered, somehow relieving me of a secret, as I set my eye lids to rest and fell into the much anticipated slumber.

My eyes snapped open and the room was bright. I was alone. I wandered for a second if it had all been a dream, but once I saw the time was 12:34 I knew it hadn't been.

Stirring from my position I observed a piece of white, lined, paper hit the ground. Bending over and picking it up, I realised it was a letter from Ben.

'Hey Baby girl,

'Well I don't really know how to say anything, I've always been shit at letters. Maybe a song would have been helpful, but not in 20 minutes. I am really sorry about yesterday. You seemed really upset after the conversation towards the car. I'm sorry for being the thick ol' Ben you're close with. (Aha, close, even though when you see this I'll be a couple miles away.)

I didn't want to wake you from your sleep, it looked like you really did need it, so when Danny called me earlier saying it was important, I had to meet him at his, I decided to not bother. But you know where he lives right? I left £20 on the table you can get a cab or bus in.

'You know, you are such an incredibly beautiful girl, you really are, and I hope you know that. Dominic called me this morning and I told him to shove his apology where the sun most certainly doesn't shine. He didn't sound to please when I told him you're mine. Aha mine. Are you? You know, are you.. mine? I don't know how to word this bit, but, all those girls I was with in school, it was all just experience and practice. There only has been one girl I have felt for, and that's a girl I've know for years called... Melissa, yeah You! You were always getting attention from other guys and I knew at that point I wouldn't treat you well enough. I was far too focused on when I would next get laid and I didn't want to use you. (Wow I just sound so stupid.)