Extra

7- Give Me A Script

"Kurt can't see anybody today," One of the orderlies at Michael Hopkins tells me as I'm standing in the lobby area the next day. I wasn't able to make it to see Kurt yesterday when I had told him that I would because after a long break in the morning, we worked through Kurt's visiting hours. Today though, they gave us a two hour lunch break so I'm taking the time to visit Kurt.

"What? Is he okay?" I ask, feeling very alarmed by how she said that.

"He's just having a rough day," She explains to me, her voice soft and slow like she's talking to one of the patients here. "He's getting through this but he's been having some violent tendencies today."

"That's okay, I still want to see him," I insist pleadingly. "Please, give me just like five minutes maybe. It could help him to see me."

"Ma'am, I'm sorry, it says here that he's at a level eight and that means that he can't see any visitors right now," She explains to me from her side of the computer.

"But I can help," I insist, a little bit louder now. "I can help, if I can just talk to him for five minutes. Please."

"Iris," Martha steps into the lobby and the orderly behind the desk looks at me with loads of sympathy. "Kurt's having an episode today. I'm sorry but you know the rules."

"I know but I just think that if he saw me, he'd feel better," I tell her, desperately wanting to believe that even though I know that it's not true. "I've just had a rough week and I really want to see him."

She looks like she's thinking about it, trying to balance the pros and cons of letting me see my brother. "You can talk to him," She decides. "But you'll have to keep your distance, alright?"

I nod. "Yes. Okay. Thank you."

I sign into the visitors log and then follow Martha into the back. Kurt is sitting at a table outside in the large courtyard, looking down at the table and murmuring to himself. With his hands tugging at his light brown hair, he doesn't even notice me walking up to the table. When Martha thinks that I'm getting too close, she touches my shoulder so I stop walking.

"Hey, Kurt," I speak loudly, trying to break through to him.

"Hi, hi, hi," He mumbles quietly but he doesn't look up from the table. "Iris."

"Yeah, it's me, it's Iris," I confirm with a nod. "How are you feeling?"

He doesn't respond.

"I'm sorry that I couldn't stop by yesterday but work took forever," I keep talking even though he's still mumbling to himself. "I'm really glad that I got to see you today."

"I can't let them get you," Kurt tells me, shaking his head and then he looks up at me, he looks angry but I can tell that he's not angry at me. When he stands up, Martha starts to stiff up. "I can't let them hurt my sister."

"Kurt," My voice is trembling now. "Nobody's going to hurt me. I'm right here, I'm fine."

"No, no, no," He shakes his head again. Martha steps forward, putting herself between me and Kurt. That's the opposite of what I want. I want to be able to hug him, to be right there for him. I want to take away all of his pain, even if that means feeling the pain myself. I don't care. I want him to feel better. Right now though, he's almost pulling out his hair to try to get an unreal bug out of his head and he's deathly afraid of an unreal group of people trying to kill both of us. My chest starts to ache so badly for my brother that it's almost hard to breathe. I can't help him, I can't do anything.

"They're going to get you," He says, his voice louder now with more conviction than before.

"Iris, I think you should leave now," Martha tells me slowly in a quiet voice in an attempt to keep her words from Kurt as she waves over a few other orderlies wearing khakis and light yellow polo uniforms. By the look on Kurt's face though, I'd say that he heard her.