Coming Home

Chapter 18

I was woken up by a faint tap on the window. It took me a few seconds to take in the room and realise that I was in my old room in the house I had grown up in. I had spent the entire day writing music reviews outside in the garden and my mum had grilled for us. I could tell that she enjoyed having me home for a bit and having someone to spoil.

Once more, there was a tap coming from the window and my eyes grew wide with horror as I realised that someone must've crawled up to the roof to watch me sleep. I whimpered as there was a third tap but could then hear a familiar voice calling my name from outside. I turned around, now facing the window, and saw Alex waving at me with a lopsided grin.  I let out a heavy sigh and tried to control my pulse as I went over to the window and let him inside. Of course it was Alex.

"What are you doing here?" I hissed as he crawled in through the small window, "I was sleeping!"

"Thought it would be fun to surprise you," he sniggered and I realised that he was pissed. His eyes were red-rimmed, his hair was a mess, and he could barely stand on his two feet, "this is almost like in the old days!" he said, referring to the many times he had snuck up here when we were teenagers.

"Well, you certainly surprised me! I thought you were a murderer or a rapist or something," I smiled and he sniggered once more.

"Matt's going to be soooo angry with me tomorrow," he sighed, "I promised that I wouldn't drink tonight."

"Why did you then?"

"I was at Amy's place and she had this really nice whiskey and I couldn't just say no to that.."

By the mentioning of her name, I could feel a knot taking form in my stomach. A million thoughts went through my mind but I managed to croak, "oh, you were on a date.."

Alex nodded eagerly, "yeah, she's really cool! I think you'll like her - she reminds me of you sometimes."

I forced a smile and nodded, "look, Alex. I have to be at NME tomorrow morning so I have to get some sleep if I want to keep my job."

"Of course - I honestly just wanted to scare the hell out of you anyway.. I'll be out of your hair now. Could you maybe just fix me a glass of water?"

I eyed him suspiciously.

"I have a bad case of cotton-mouth," he said innocently and I gave him the benefit of the doubt and snuck downstairs to the kitchen to fix him a glass of water.

As I returned upstairs again, I could see that Alex had placed himself on my bed, fully dressed, and already half-asleep.

"Get up, Turner! I'm not sharing my bed with you. We're not teenagers anymore."

He mumbled something intelligible and I could see that he was in absolutely no condition to be out on the streets on his own. I let out a heavy sigh as I realised that I had already lost this battle. "Alright then.. Scoot over.." I mumbled and he made room for me on the bed while accepting the glass I was offering him.

He smiled, took a big gulp of water, and said, "I knew I could convince you!"

Forcefully, I managed to pull off his boots before I lay myself down next to him. I closed my eyes, trying to go back to sleep. He reeked of whiskey but for some reason, I liked it. It reminded me of teenage-Alex.

"Matt's really going to be pissed..." Alex mumbled after a couple of seconds.

"That's what you get for breaking your promise."

"He broke his too," Alex mumbled.

"Which promise did Matt make?" I asked even though I honestly didn't care about their banter.

"He said that he wouldn't say anything to you but he did anyway."

Intrigued and with wide eyes, I popped myself up on my elbow and looked down at Alex who was sprawled across my bed, "what did he say to me?" I had no idea what Alex was on about.

Alex didn't seem to hear me and continued "Hey, remember last time I was lying here?"

I groaned and threw myself down on the bed again, "I'd rather not."

Alex opened his eyes, and even though he was pissed, I could still see the confusion written across his face, "why not? Because of what happened or because of the aftermath?"

"A little bit of both, I guess," I whispered.

"Are you still embarassed?"

"Are you?"

He looked at me with huge eyes, "I never was."

"Me neither. Everything was just...different after."

"It was"

"I really regret it"

He furrowed his brows, "You do?"

I noddded, "yes! don't you?"

His eyes were intense, "I don't know. I regret how everything was handled but why would I regret being with you?"

I didn't know what to answer to that so I just looked at him.

"I've thought about you a lot over the past years.." he then said, "I always imagined that no matter how angry with me you were, you still listened to my music. I imagined that you heard all the references in the songs and you'd realise that I still thought about you. But I never heard from you."

"You waited for me to contact you?"

"I'm not sure. Maybe on some level."

I was quiet for a few seconds before I said,  "The references that you keep talking about: Can you mention them?"

"I think you should listen to the songs yourself."

"But what if I don't get them?" I asked nervously.

"You'll get them," he chuckled, "You'll definitely recognize yourself in loads of the songs."

We didn't speak for a while. I don't think any of us knew what to say, and suddenly I could hear Alex' breathing becoming heavy with sleep. I closed my eyes and tried to empty my head - it proved to be much harder than I had thought it would be.

Just before I drifted off I thought I heard Alex mumble beside me, "you look really nice. You look nice even in tennis socks and without make up."

"Thanks, Al," I laughed, "what makes you say that all of a sudden?"

"I dunno. Matt thinks I'm in love with you."