77. A Plea For Help

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OKAY, GO BACK TO MY FIRST CHAPTER AND SEE WHAT I COMMENTED AT THE BOTTOM. LOOK HOW FUCKING INNOCENT I WAS. WHAT HAVE YOU LOT DONE TO ME. WHEN I FIRST MADE THIS I WAS LIKE 'will they be mad if I make them swear and stuff'. Look where we are now.

And look what I wrote on chapter four. Oh my... here it is, word for word : Mild stuff. Like kissing or something. I sound like a preschooler, damn. I don't know how to write about extreme shit.

Damn. Innocence goes really fast, doesn't it?

Trigger: mentions of self harm/ mentions of attempting suicide. (NOTHING ACTUALLY HAPPENS THOUGH OKAY)
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Sam's P.O.V

"That was fun."

As soon as the words leave my mouth, I realise how wrong I am. Realisation hits me square in the face, causing a bruise of shock to form. I killed him.

The gun drops out of my hand, as I stare open mouthed at the officer, who was only doing his job, and I killed him. I snap out of the horrible trance I was in - but this time, I have no one to blame but myself.

I looked over Jeremiah's shoulder, and for some reason my fucked up brain though that it was Hatter. I didn't even think twice when I shot him. But the thing is, it wasn't Hatter.

"Oh, my God," I choke, not even registering when Jeremiah picks the gun up from in front of me.

"Hands up, now!" I hear a shout at the door, and I focus on Jim Gordon. He looks at the body, before glancing back up at Jeremiah, who has a gun pointed at him. He thinks that Jeremiah killed him.

"Samantha, come here, please," Jim instructs, as I shiver, but not due the cold.

I killed someone. I did it. I never thought I would but I... did. Yes, I guess Jerome... and Vicky were also people I killed, but this time is different.

"No, you're going to stay behind me. You move a muscle, and I'll shoot Captain Gordon here," Jeremiah growls, but I can hear the tint of worry in his tone.

"As soon as you pull the trigger, I'll pull mine. We'll both be dead, Jeremiah. And here I thought that you were smarter than your brother."

"I-I can't do this," I whimper, my hands latching onto the scalp of my hair tightly, as I look down at the snowy floor.

I need to get out of here, before I hurt someone else.

"Samantha," Jeremiah warns, but I notice his finger move away from the trigger. This is my only chance.

"I'm sorry," I blurt out, before turning and running in the direction of the forest.

A gunshot rings out, but I don't turn around to see who's been shot.

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Jeremiah's P.O.V

I let out a deep breath as Ecco patches up the bullet wound in my shoulder - caused by Gordon. Luckily, the woman came up behind him before he could finish me off, knocking him out.

Don't ask me how we got out of there... we just ran. Ecco had killed a lot of the officers, not even getting so much as a scratch on herself. I had to let Samantha go, although I didn't want to.

Of course, I will find her again. It's inevitable. We're like magnets. Although I want to be angry at her, I'm not. She thought it was the right thing to do, although it really, really wasn't.

'I can't believe she left you, brother. Then again, you do get her shot, strangle her, slap her or shout at her on a day to day basis, so I'm not particularly surprised,' Jerome breathes in my ear, making it seem like a he's actually next to me. He's not.

I'm just worried about what Sam might do now. She looked so guilty and in a rage with herself after killing that man. I don't want to think about what will happen to her if she's left alone for too long. Her mental state is already crumbling, and all I'm doing is trying to pick up the pieces.

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Third Person P.O.V

Samantha wraps the towel around her body, after stepping out of the shower. She managed to sneak into one of the apartments in the city, without being spotted. She can hear the shouts of crazed lunatics, and the police car sirens, but other then that the streets of Gotham are strangely silent.

Her eyes dance over to the razor on the side, and before she releases what she's doing she grabs it.

Thoughts run around her mind. What would happen if she died? Would she be preventing the deaths of anymore people? Would she be stopping anymore heartbreak?

Before... everything, she never would've contemplated this. But, before everything, she was happy. She has the boy who she fell for in the circus, she had Vicky, and she wasn't constantly on the run from anyone.

But then, she thinks about what it would do to others. Jim, Bruce, Ecco, Lee (wherever the hell she is), hell maybe even Barbara. And most importantly, Jeremiah.

She used to be terrified of the man. But, after realising how much he's taken care of her, after he hit her, and even after Tetch changed her... she recognises how much he cares for her. Yes, it's clearly possessive and unhealthy, but even after losing her mind, Jeremiah was still there for her.

It's wrong for her to think like this - but no one else has stuck with her for so long. Her mother, Jerome and Vicky died, her father didn't care for her, and everyone else grew distant. Sure, maybe not Bruce.

Bruce has tried to protect her throughout every time he was with her. He has gone through around the same as her.

Her mind then goes back to Jerome. He would never want this.

"You're my best friend... and you will always be the best thing that's ever happened to me."

Without thinking about it again, Sam throws the razor on the cold floor, a tear leaking from her eye to show that she really is human once more.

She wants to speak with him again. Bruce must understand what's going on. He has to. He would've felt like he was going somewhat insane too, right?

It isn't okay for her to want Bruce to feel a little crazy too.

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