Louder

Chaptee 10

      Liam and I sat at our usual cafeteria table. Neither of were talking and I glanced at Liam, noticing the way he watched Serena, who sat at another table with her new friends. I followed his gaze and stared at Serena, who was laughing loudly.

      Serena hadn't been hanging out with us lately. She made new friends who had seen her at Vandos and she began to hang out with them more and more everyday. It started off with her hanging out with them once a week to her hanging out with them everyday. She kept telling us she'd come back to us, but I was beginning to realize Serena was moving onto better things. She was finally rid of the losers who rather be alone than popular.

      "Serena's changing," Liam said, looking at me.

     "What do you mean?" I asked.

     "She doesn't hang out with us anymore. She's always busy. She's just... not the way she used to be."

     I didn't know what to say, so I simply shrugged. Things were changing and I couldn't blame Serena completely for changing. She was becoming incredibly popular due to her performances at Vandos. Everyone wanted to hang out with her or be her, and she was basking in that fame. And despite the fact that she left Liam and I for her new life, I was happy for her. All Serena ever wanted was to be known and popular, and she finally was.

     "Do you think she'll hang out with us again?" Liam asked.

     "Who'll hang out with you again?" Serena asked, surprising us.

     We turned to look at Serena and my eyes widened. It had been so long since she talked to us at school that I was confused.

     "You," Liam said. "Did you forget we existed?"

     Serena looked uncomfortable and she looked down. Liam rolled his eyes at her reaction and I stared at her, wondering about the answer to Liam's question.

     "Anyways," Serena said, ignoring Liam. "Nivenah, Carson told me to tell you that they need you at the restaurant today. He's not here today, so he told me to tell you."

     "Oh, okay," I said. "I'll go after school."

     "Sounds good. I'll see you later."

     Serena quietly left, leaving Liam and I to stare after her. Neither of us said anything. Even though I knew both of us had her on our mind, we stared longingly at her.

*****

     I was humming as I washed the dishes. It was a bad habit I had and knowing Carson was running around Vandos, I knew I was safe from him catching me. That left me humming louder.

     "Your humming is calming," Carson said, causing me to jump.

     "Oh!" I exclaimed. "I thought you were waiting tables?"

     "I was. The restaurant's not busy today, so I came to help you."

     I blushed and looked away, unsure of what to say. Scolding myself, I made a note to stop humming in Vandos.

     "You know," Carson said, walking up to my side. "Your humming sounds familiar. I'm not sure why, but there's something familiar about it."

     I stiffened, but said, "I don't think humming has a distinct sound, does it? Like everyone sounds similar when they hum."

     "No, there's definitely something distinct about your humming. I can know it's you."

     I glanced at Carson who was staring at me, a look of curiosity on his face. Blushing, I looked back at the dish I was washing, praying he'd drop the topic. No one had caught onto the fact that Serena was pretending to sing and I prayed things stayed that way.

     "Hey guys!" Serena exclaimed, throwing the door open. "What's going on?"

     Growing relieved that Serena interrupted our conversation, I turned to face her and grinned. Serena looked a bit confused by my reaction, but she ignored it.

     "Carson and I are going on a date after your shift is over," Serena said. "Do you want to join us? You can bring Liam with you."

     "Sure," I said. 

     "Perfect." Serena grinned. "Can't wait."

     I smiled at Serena, but something in my heart hurt a bit. Serena and I never got to hang out anymore. We only saw each other either when we went on dates together or when I would sing for her at Vandos. I was beginning to miss my best friend.

*****

     Serena screamed as the rollercoaster tipped over and sped down the drop. I closed my eyes and Liam laughed beside me. Peeking at Carson, I laughed when I noticed how hard his grip was on the railings. He seemed just as terrified as I was.

     The wind soared past us and my black hair flew everywhere. Serena's blond hair was also flying and I grinned. I was having a blast and smiling to myself, I savoured the moment.

     Serena, Carson, Liam and I stumbled off the rollercoaster. We walked towards a bench, knowing all of us needed a break from the rides. The day was almost over and we were all exhausted.

     "I'm going to go to the washroom," Serena said.

     We nodded and Serena walked off. I looked at Liam, noticing the way he stared at her.

     "I'm going to play some games," Liam said. "Do either of you want to join me?"

     "I think I need a break," I said, smiling. "But have fun."

     "Same," Carson said. "I feel fried."

     Liam nodded and walked off, leaving Carson and I alone to sit on the bench. We sat next either other wordlessly and I stared at rides in the amusement park.

      "You're awfully quiet," Carson said.

     "You are, too," I said, looking at him. "I always wondered why you call me out for being quiet when you're the same way."

      "I'm not trying to be sexist, but girls usually tend to talk more. It's just... unusual to see a girl so quiet."

     I rolled my eyes, but smiled. Carson wasn't the first person to mention that.

     "Well, that's sexist of you to assume I would be like other girls," I said, giving him a look. "But, I like being quiet. People keep telling me to change, but I like being the way I am. I don't feel the need to fill every silence with useless chatter."

     "I don't think you need to change, but... I think the people calling your out for being quiet are the people who want to get to know you better," Carson said. "They're not trying to attack who you are, they're just trying to get you to open up to them."

     "Is that what you're trying to do?"

     Caron didn't reply immediately. He just stared at me, his hazel eyes glistening as the sun set. I stared back, silent.

     "Yeah, that's what I'm trying to do," Carson said. "I'm quiet because I prefer to observe people. I like to figure them out. But you... I just can't seem to figure you out."

     "If it makes you feel better, I'm not that interesting," I said softly, touched Carson actually wanted to get to know me. "You'll be highly disappointed when you figure me out."

     "I don't believe that."

     Carson smiled at me then, his entire face lighting up. My heart grew warm and I couldn't help but grin back. Carson rarely smiled, but when he did it lit up his entire face. It was like every smile he repressed was exploding out of him and I loved the expression he wore. It was an expression that I kept saved in my mind.

      Neither of us continued our conversation after that. We sat in silence, staring at the sky that slowly turned from golden to black. And although things should've been uncomfortable with the silence, I never felt more at peace around someone.