Hostage

Suicide

Billie places the wings and pizza on the stand next to the couch. I slowly sit down and Billie scotches me close to her. I blush as a grabs my waist to move me close to her. I start to fiddle with my thumbs. I start to get really worried. Is she gonna hit me again for some reason tonight? She grabbed a slice of pizza out from the box. She starts eating it and I grab a slice too. I get shy and I take a small bite. Billie looks at me weirdly and she swallows her food before speaking to me.

"Why are you so shy when your eating around me? Do I scare you or something?"

Yeah you kinda do. You hit me all the time so I'm scared of you asshole.

"I'm just scared your going to be an ass and hit me"

She puts down her slice of pizza and she gives me a death grin. Oh shit. I called her an ass. She's gonna hit me...

"Excuse me?!"

She stands up and she gets in my face.

"I take care of you and you call me an ass?!"

She slaps my face and I tear up. Shit. That's it. I'm going to kill myself. She sighs and she sits back down. She picks me up roughly and she sits me on her lap. I squeak as she grips onto my waist a bit too roughly. I start to tear up. She's gonna hate me after I kill myself. I wiggle on Billie's lap. She groans a bit and I feel something poking me through her pants. Was it her phone?

"Billie what's poking me?"

She rolls her eyes.

"Don't worry about it kitten. Just stay where you are and stop wiggling your hips."

I nod. I look down at my body. Fuck. It hate it.
I'm going to take a shower.

"Billie. I'm going to take a shower."

She hums and I get up from her lap. I quickly go into the shower and I sigh. I take my pills out of the desk. I quickly grab a cup of water and I spill all the pills onto my hands. I gulp all the pills down and I cry. I take off all of my clothes. I grab the razor and I dig the razor into my thigh. Blood gushed out of my thigh. I start shaking and crying loudly. I watch as all the blood starts pooling. The shower water dyed a bright red color. I dig the razor into to my thigh again, diving in deeper. Fuck. I want to be dead. Fuck this shit. I fucking hate my body. I look down at my naked body, I need more scars to cover it up. Matter in fact, I won't be alive to see what I have done to it. I hear Billie knocking on the door and calling my name out. I did not respond. I froze up. I don't know what to do. She's gonna hit me again. I start to feel really dizzy from all the blood loss and pills I took. My head starts pounding and I see Billie opening the door. She was yelling at me then she stops when she sees me, bleeding to death. I look down at my thighs, still blood pouring out. I start to get really sleepy. Billie quickly shuts the shower off and she runs to grab a towel, cursing herself for letting this happen to me. She looks over and saw my pill bottle empty. She starts breaking down and crying.

"NO STOP! PLEASE! Y/N! I FUCKING LOVE YOU!"

She picks me up with the towel and I start to fall limp. Billie screams and she puts me onto the bed carefully. She than ran out of our room to get something. I start to tear up. Did Billie just say that she loves me? The blood stops flowing from my thighs. I start to feel better. I shut my eyes for a few seconds. I look up at the ceiling. Billie comes in and she quickly covers my cuts up with gauze. She starts to get blood all over her hands. She shakes to death and I feel super bad for her. Why did I do this to her? I start crying and Billie finishes wrapping my thighs up. Billie sits down on the bed. She un wrapped the towel from me. She looks at my body up and down. She looks at every one of my scars and cuts on my body. She takes my arm gently and she looks at the cuts. She starts to cry again. She looks up and down my body again. I sigh.

"Stop looking at me if it makes you sad."

She looks into my eyes.

"I love you y/n. Why are you harming yourself?"

I look at the ceiling and then back at Billie.

"Suicidal thoughts and depression. I thought I was never good enough."

Billie looks at me very sadly.

"Let me heal you kitten. Let me show you how much I love and care for you. Let me help you love"

I slip a tear by. No one has ever told me that. I nod my head and Billie gives me a gentil and caring hug. She kisses my forehead and she smiles. I get the courage to tell her.

"Billie, I have had a crush on you for a while now. I still do like you even tho you hit me and call me names."

Billie looks at me sadly. She bows done her head in shame.

"I hit you and say mean things to you only because I'm afraid that I'm gonna lose you. But, that is not a good reason to hurt the person I love most. I promise you that I'll stop hurting you kitten. I just need better ways with coping with my feelings for you."

I smile at her.

"Don't worry Billie, things will get better I promise."

She takes my hand and she kisses it. My heart melts. She gets up and she grabs something from the dresser. It was something silky and red.

"Can you stand up? Or do you need help?"

I sit up in the bed and I try to stand. I instantly fell onto the ground because the pain was really bad. My thighs hurt really badly. I got really shy when i realized I was naked and I was with the person I love. I look down at my body and I shriek. I quickly cover up my nipple piercings and I dart my eyes to the ground, not wanting to look at Billie. Billie chuckles and she brings her hand up to me, wanting to help me up. I look at her hand and I place my hand onto hers, exposing my nipple. She does not care enough so she does not stare at my nude body. I like how she was respecting my body and not being like all the other boys, always wanting to look at my body nude. She carefully helps me to the bed and she sits me down onto the bed. She takes the red silk and she holds it up to show me. It was a very pretty ruby red, silk nightgown. She handed me a red laced thong to put on. I stare at Billie. I need help putting this on.

"I need help putting this on Billie"

She puts down the babydoll and she helps me put on the thong. She slips the silk onto my body and she blushes. I look down at myself. I look pretty. My piercings were kinda poking out of the babydoll. She smiles and she lays down besides me, grabbing onto my waist and pulling me close to her. She spoons me and I smile.

"Goodnight kitten"

"Goodnight Billie"

We both softly drift off into slumber, holing onto each other like we were married.