To Be A Leader

Chapter 50: This Town Ain't Big Enough For Both Of Us

"Okay, Runner Five, let's just do a couple minutes of really gentle jogging to start with," Kytan says, and I nod, breathing in the warm air, looking around at the grass and trees. I keep my breathing steady, as I've practiced.

"We'll run alongside you for now, Five," Veronica says softly. "And I've clipped the modification device to your ear. I think that should make it easier for you to fend Moonchild off. And we think gentle running is actually good for your Moonchild Syndrome. It seems to keep that part of your brain under control."

I hear Sam sigh over my headset. "Yeah, it's all really confusing. Because like, well, Moonchild turns up when you're stressed and running away from stuff, but maybe it's actually the running that stops her from taking over completely."

"It's certainly possible," Maxine agrees. "Five, do you remember when you were at Noah Base, and you had that seizure? Maybe Moonchild was able to do that to you because you weren't running, and therefore she had more control. It's all hypothetical; We can't know for sure, but we do need to make sure you're not vulnerable to having Moonchild suddenly triggered."

I don't reply. It's weird, knowing this could not only help me control it when Moonchild shows up, but maybe even block her out completely. I mean, I've had visions of this. But now that we're here...

I have mixed emotions. I want Moonchild gone. I want her out of my head. I want this! But at the same time, I know how Moonchild has helped me get out of sticky situations. What will happen if I get trapped and she's not there to help me? I fear I've become partially dependent on her assistance.

I need her now.

I wonder if that was what she wanted.

"Yes," Veronica says, pulling me from my thoughts, "because we know that you're part of the Minister's final plan to destroy Abel. She has notes in that file about how she's going to transmit a trigger signal which will make you come to her before the final assault on Abel."

Sam shudders, "So, yeah, Five, that's really awful news, isn't it? Does that horrible news make you feel Moonchild-y?"

I resist the urge to facepalm. "No, darling, it doesn't."

Kytan smiles widely at me. "That's really good. That's great. All the meditation and breathing exercises you've been doing is paying off. You're ready for... field testing."

The way he says that does not make me feel secure. "Field testing?"

"We're going to do a few stress-y things to you, and see how you go, okay?"

I swallow thickly, but nod and squash nod the worry that churns in my stomach. Kytan and Veronica sprint ahead of me to a dark green truck to my left. There's a zombie inside, scratching at the glass, snarling, growling, the works. Veronica and Kytan climb on top of the truck, and once I'm in position, Veronica reaches down and opens the door.

The zombie practically falls out of the truck, its hungry gaze on me, since it probably doesn't realize that Veronica and Kytan are closer.

"Run, Five!" Kytan yells. "And do your meditation, like we practiced!"

I swallow again, although it feels a bit harder this time. I'm not really worried about the zombie. I've dealt with plenty of those, especially regular, shambling ones like these. I'm worried about whether this will work, and what I'll do if it does.

I take a deep breath, forcing myself to keep my eyes ahead and ignore the groaning and growling behind me. I've ran from zombies before Moonchild, and I can run from them without her now.

I pick up the pace after looking back, seeing that that zombie is a bit faster than the average shambler, but not a fast zombie. I'm so glad those are extinct. Still, I keep breathing in and out, not thinking about Moonchild, not thinking about how the last time we did stuff to help with my mind we ended up bringing her to life in my mind, not thinking about how Sigrid plans on using me as a vessel to kill literally everyone I've ever loved-