Lost in You

Chapter 38 - Meredith

I go to the boutique with Yuka. We are using my black Mercedes with tinted glass so the paparazzi couldn't see who is inside the car.

I look at the hanging dresses. Carly comes from the back. "Hi Meredith"

"Hi Carly" I smile warmly to her. She looks at me from head to toe. "Ahh you gain some weight. Good good. You look sexier and healthier like this. Perfect figure." She goes to the dresses.

I smile drinking my mimosa. My brain keeps coming back to Ian. His face is so sincere. Should I trust him? What if he was planning to sleep with Jemima but he found out that there were a lot of paparazzi outside?

"It's cold in NYC at this time of the year. But I really love this outfit. Take a look" she takes out the dress. Hot pink long sleeves. The hem of the dress cut around uptight.

"Valentino dress, and we can match it up with these black boots. I have a fur jacket. But I don't think you will be comfortable wearing it while playing piano with Christian. Because it's so thick." Carly explains.

"Gosh but without the jacket you will be freezing, Mer!" Yuka says.

Yuka is right, but I fell in love with the dress already. "Um.. how long will I stand on the stage Yuka?"

She checks on her phone. "2 songs and countdown. Total around 15-20 mins."

"Well I think I can handle it. The first song I will sing the whole song, the second I will play the piano with Ian. I can take off the jacket on the second performance and try to not freeze for the countdown"

"I remind you it's cold and windy, Mer" Yuka says.

"Well she can always ask Christian to warm her" Carly and Yuka laugh. I just smile.

"You don't believe the news right, Mer! It looked so clear they just had business dinner. The way Christian looked at you is so different. Like he looks at his goddess" Yuka says.

Carly laughs "yeah! I will pay for a man who can look at me like Christian look at you Mer!"

I smile "C'mon let's try the dress. If this is as what I expected then I will be look magnificent"

***

I'm standing in front of Ian's door. I inhale deeply and I just about to press the bell, Ian opens the door. I jump back "sweet Jesus, Ian!"

"Merry" he also looks surprised. And then he smiles happily. "Come in" he pulls me and closes the door.

"Where do you want to go?" I ask him.

"Um... nowhere..." he rakes his hair. I look at him suspiciously. "Um... I was about to knock on your door. I thought..."

"You thought I wouldn't come and avoid you again?"

He actually looks a bit scared. "I'm sorry Merry, I..." he just looks at me. What is on your mind, Ian? Are you afraid that I will leave you? Tell me... tell me you need me like I need you in my life.

The oven ding. He looks at it "come on eat. I made lasagna for you" he smiles softly to me and takes my hand to the kitchen.

It smells so good. "Did you make it?" I ask him.

"Yeah. I told you I'm going to cook for you. Cook doesn't mean reheating the food" he chuckles and I snort "yes, wiseass".

We eat the lasagna in silence.

"This is good Ian" I smile at him.

"You like it? I can make it for you everyday if you want" he smiles to me. I look at the food and eat. Why do you want me to be with you? Is it just because you feel comfortable with me, or you love me like I love you. Part of me thinks, I don't care what you think about me as long as we can be together.